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I feel like you should grant me this.</p><p id="ea0a">I want a puppy.</p><p id="b3eb">Not an ugly one. A pup that will melt hearts and look nice on Instagram so I can rake the likes in.</p><p id="e5cf">My puppy will be called <b><i>“Help”</i></b> so I get more attention when I shout his name on walks. I already have a female dog that I hope he gets on with. She’s called <b><i>“Fire”</i></b>.</p><p id="926d">A fluffy companion would really help my mental wellbeing and stop me from screaming in random people’s faces on the bus.</p><p id="48a7">There is a famous saying:</p><p id="f4c9" type="7">“A dog is for life, not just for Christmas” — Cruella De Vil</p><p id="36db">I completely agree with this and I will look after the animal for life. I will walk it, feed it, and put hilarious Christmas light-up jumpers on it.</p><p id="935e">Santa, please help me out, bro. If you do this for me I promise I’ll stop stealing mince pies from pensioners. They don’t put up much of a fight you see.</p><p id="d755">I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year unless I don’t get a puppy. I will be stealing your mince pies if that happens.</p><p id="6789">All my love and kisses,</p><p id="4286">Say hi to the missus,</p><p id="cae3">Adam ❤</p><p id="b45b">Everyone read this piece by <a href="undefined">Ann James</a> below which The New York Times describes as <b><i>“nice”.</i></b></p><div id="cb20" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium

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.com/the-winner-of-the-november-deluded-custodians-challenge-and-the-december-writing-prompt-5efa357295b0"> <div> <div> <h2>The Winner of the November ‘Deluded Custodians’ Challenge and the December Writing Prompt</h2> <div><h3>The November Entries: Three Exquisite Corpse Threesomes and One AWC Prompt Response</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*qob_uHBjfKoBdJVMdiWLSA.gif)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="7aeb">Write a family-friendly letter to <a href="undefined">Santa Claus</a> before December 31st, and you’ll be entered into the Deluded Custodians writing contest.</p><div id="b272" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/letters-to-santa-with-a-cash-prize-b54622f3d7c3"> <div> <div> <h2>Letters to Santa with a Cash Prize</h2> <div><h3>Join the Deluded Custodians December Writing Challenge</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*[email protected])"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

Deluded Custodians Writing Challenge

My Letter to Santa Claus

Dude, where’s my pony?!

Read them you old fool! Pwetty pwease! — Photo: Edgar on Unsplash

Dear Santa,

Thank you for finding the time to read this. I know this time of the year must be strange for you as it’s the only time when you’re not unemployed.

This year I’ve been very good. I rescued that nun from a burning building. She wasn’t too happy about it saying I’d set the church on fire in the first place but at least I helped her! People have no gratitude these days!

What else did I do? Oh yeah! This little old lady came up to me on the street and asked if I had any spare coins for the bus. I told her I had just the right amount and went on my merry way. I’m glad I could inform her accurately and I’m sure I lightened up her morning.

My good deeds should not go unrewarded Santa. I only want one big gift, and as I’m so awesome I feel like you should grant me this.

I want a puppy.

Not an ugly one. A pup that will melt hearts and look nice on Instagram so I can rake the likes in.

My puppy will be called “Help” so I get more attention when I shout his name on walks. I already have a female dog that I hope he gets on with. She’s called “Fire”.

A fluffy companion would really help my mental wellbeing and stop me from screaming in random people’s faces on the bus.

There is a famous saying:

“A dog is for life, not just for Christmas” — Cruella De Vil

I completely agree with this and I will look after the animal for life. I will walk it, feed it, and put hilarious Christmas light-up jumpers on it.

Santa, please help me out, bro. If you do this for me I promise I’ll stop stealing mince pies from pensioners. They don’t put up much of a fight you see.

I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year unless I don’t get a puppy. I will be stealing your mince pies if that happens.

All my love and kisses,

Say hi to the missus,

Adam ❤

Everyone read this piece by Ann James below which The New York Times describes as “nice”.

Write a family-friendly letter to Santa Claus before December 31st, and you’ll be entered into the Deluded Custodians writing contest.

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