My Letter to Santa
My letter to Santa in which I dream of the eradication of some of life’s minor annoyances
Dear Santa,
I’ve been a good boy all year.
My cholesterol is in check and I remembered to take all of my vitamin supplements like a champ.
I ate my broccoli and Brussels sprouts and supported our local farmers.
As you know, my partner and I have been chipping away at the “merging households” boxes and have come to the conclusion that we really don’t need more stuff, especially not dust collectors… unless you want to send a case of Swiffers to go along with them.
For that reason, don’t worry about placing an order for us at the workshop. Instead could you see what you can do about the following appended list?
Best regards
André
Special wish list for Santa:
- For tissues to not explode in the washing machine.
- For the safe return of socks that have gone missing from the laundry.
- For TV networks to not conspire and load up Sunday evenings with some of the week’s best television shows and create a scheduling nightmare for my PVR.
- Cling wrap that actually clings to what you want it to cling to, not everything else… including itself.
- Computer applications and software that will not completely hijack my system resources to perform an update, preventing me from typing out the subject of an “a ha” moment.
- Computer updates that don’t arbitrarily relocate buttons and toolbars.
- For the concern about carbon footprints to get similarly extended to goods, and producing more robust, longer-lasting, quality goods rather than pushing the cheap and disposable.
- For expiry dates to not pass me so quickly.
- For a return to the lost art of thinking before speaking, especially where the Internet is concerned.
- For SUV and van drivers to take 15 seconds to brush the snow off the roof of their vehicle after a snowfall, before heading on to the highway.
- More media coverage of genuinely inspirational people.
- For news media to challenge themselves to tell a story without using the word “shock”.
- Fewer mornings when I wake up feeling hung over or achy… and I did not have a drop to drink the day before… now, THAT’s a shock!
- For stores to get together and jointly use a loyalty system. My wallet can’t hold as many “point cards” as I own, and frankly, my butt would look funny if I did find a way to carry them all in my wallet.
- For my mailbox to not be 99% full of ad mail (especially in December).
- To remain unsubscribed from email lists when I have taken the time to do so, but sometimes it doesn’t seem to stick.
- Smoke detectors that won’t react to toast that is merely “well done”.
- For my cat to become better friends with the vacuum cleaner, especially during peak shedding season.
- I would also wish for random acts of kindness to not be the exception.
- I would wish for people to find the spirit and meaning of the holidays, to maintain that spirit throughout the year ahead and to treat others as they would like to be treated.
- I wish everyone patience, understanding, compassion and respect.
I would also like to take a moment to thank you, the readers, for your kindness and generosity in taking the time to check out my articles.
I wish you all a wonderful holiday season.
Did you enjoy this post? If you did, your claps, comments and follows are most appreciated.
Sincere thanks for reading!
Have a great day,
André