My Crazy Morning Brew
Hot, spicy, creamy weirdness.
I’ve developed some odd habits over the past few years. For example, I can eat leftovers until they’re coming out of my ears. This makes my husband nuts. Unless I make a dish he really likes, he’s a “one and done” type of guy. I’ve been known to eat even seafood, for several days in a row. I don’t know. I must have a cast-iron stomach.
Another quirk: I hoard beauty products like someone obsessed. And, I suppose I am. As an OCD sufferer, this is a complete affront to my dislike of clutter. But, I tell myself that, since my hoard is an organized one, I have nothing to worry about. So, I continue to buy highlighters and bronzers and red lipsticks — as if the red carpet is beckoning and I need to be ready.
I stash them in drawers and closets all over our house. There’s even a box in the laundry room where I stow the products that our currently in rotation, or that I plan to give to my sister and niece.
Honestly, I would to go through this stuff and toss or donate half of it, but when I peer inside even one drawer, I am completely overwhelmed. I mean, how many unicorn highlighters does one woman need?
On to supplements. I take lots and lots of supplements. This, I know, is fallout from having breast cancer. Some of them are standard, like Vitamin C and Biotin. Others, not so: Cat’s Claw. Sulforaphane. IB6. DIM.
When I wake up in the morning, I wash my supplements down with a glass of warm water with lemon, apple cider vinegar and a dash of cranberry juice. This crazy mish-mash really gets the system moving. Sometimes, I add a dash of cayenne pepper for that little extra “boost.”
As my stomach roils from all the shit rolling around in it, I head to the basement where do a “mini workout.” This is in addition to my “real” afternoon exercise hit.
I perform 100 jumping jacks, followed by 20 pushups and 30 tricep dips.
After, I take my invigorated ass back upstairs and get to the highlight of my morning: My crazy cup of java. This is how it works:
First, I pour Silk Almond Milk Creamer into my cup. At least a couple ounces, maybe more. Then, I top that with cashew milk, which is naturally creamy, with a hint of sweetness.
I nuke this mixture for 80 seconds, and then I add several sprinkles of cinnamon, a dash or two of cayenne pepper, a splash of sugar-free maple syrup, and then, the coup de gras: A scoop of either collagen powder or protein powder.
I use an electric beverage frother to whip everything up nice and creamy, then I add half the mixture to a glass and set it aside for my second cup of coffee.
Finally, I pour coffee on top of all that creamy goodness and it’s ready to enjoy.
The result: Creamy, a little sweet, a little spicy…just right. For me, anyway. And, here’s the best part. My special coffee keeps me sated for hours. It’s turned me into an inadvertent, intermittent faster! (Who knew?)
Yep. Cayenne pepper in my coffee. I never said I wasn’t crazy, folks. The next time you’re feeling a little “out there,” give it a try.
It’s my morning kick in the ass, and God knows, sometimes, I need it.
Sherry McGuinn is a longtime Chicago-area writer and award-winning screenwriter. Her work has appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times and numerous other publications. Sherry’s manager is currently pitching her newest screenplay, a drama with dark, comedic overtones and inspired by a true story.
