My Answers for 15 Inspiring Questions

Prompt from John Ross

I received these questions from John Ross and Gurpreet Dhariwal who also shared it from Aurora Eliam, Salam Khan and Kevin Buddaeus and I loved it!

Such insightful questions into one’s life. Here is a little more of my journey and I would love to hear yours too! So please tag me if you answer as well :)

1. What’s something that nobody could ever steal from you?

My creativity. We are given qualities that nobody else has. We need to respect our talents and gifts. We should also be supporting each other in our quest to find those gifts within us. That’s why this writing community on Medium is important. We need each other as a reminder that we can be ourselves.

2. Who would you like to forgive right now?

My friend Jeff. He didn’t show up for a very important event in my life, and I have had a difficult time forgiving him for that. I understand that he had his reasons, but it still hurt a lot. I understand that forgiveness is for me and not the other person. If I hold onto a resentment it only hurts me.

3. What is happiness?

It is knowing that there is a plan for my life that is beyond my understanding. It is knowing that I will always be taken care of. The sense of security that comes along with this brings me great joy. Happiness cannot be dependent on outside events, because they are constantly changing. I cannot base my happiness on a specific outcome. I believe that most things work out for good in the end, even when things don’t appear to be going well. I struggle with this all the time, because I witness incredible pain in the world. Amid the pain I am finding a way to have inner peace. This makes me happy.

4. What impact do you want to leave on the people you love?

I want them to know that they matter to me. I want them to feel cared for and respected. It’s important to me that they are protected, and I would like to be a person they feel safe with. When my wife comes to me and confides in me something very personal, it means the world to me. I treasure that trust she is placing in me. I would like to believe that the impact I am having is making her feel safe in this world. I am deeply grateful that I have become trustworthy.

5. What is life too short to tolerate?

Being unkind to ourselves. Life is challenging enough. When I say anything unkind to myself, I am making things more difficult. I would never accept an unkind word from somebody else. Why would I allow myself to inflict that pain on me? Today, I do everything I can to be good to John. Self-care is very important. Every day I try to find a way to be good to myself. I do this by meditating every morning, getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, and by exercising every afternoon. When I am taking loving care of me, I become a better steward of my precious life. Life is short. I don’t want to waste a minute of it being mean.

6. What’s something that used to scare you, but doesn’t anymore?

I used to be afraid to swim in the ocean. That ended after my wife taught me scuba diving. Now I dive every weekend. My patient wife allowed me to work through my fears. Now I love it. Diving has become a fun experience for me. I am grateful to my wife for giving me this gift.

7. What do you want to remember forever?

My wedding. It was the most amazing wedding I have ever attended. I know. It was my wedding, and of course I’m going to say that. But even if it wasn’t my wedding, I would still say it. We had a 60-member gospel choir and a five-piece band on stage performing behind us as we said our vows. It was remarkable! We had a friend videotape the ceremony, and every year my wife and I watch it. It’s awesome! I will remember that day for the rest of my life.

8. What do you always look forward to?

Eating my wife’s wonderful food. She is an amazing cook. Every meal is an event. In the nine years that we have been married I have not had a bad meal. It’s not just the food I look forward to. It is sitting down and spending time with my wife when we eat that is so precious to me. We do watch TV sometimes, but many of our meals are spent in conversation about some interesting events of the day. I treasure my mealtime with her. My talks with my wife help me to process my day and get me off on the right foot. I also look forward to falling asleep next to my wife every night. They are the most wonderful eight hours of my day.

9. What do you most appreciate about your life?

That I am happy most of the time. I have become a grateful person who recognizes that I have it good. I appreciate that as I get older, I am becoming a happier person. I am less concerned about what people think about me, and more concerned about how I can care for other people. I am grateful that I am surrounded by many caring people who love me for who I am. I don’t need to be any different for the people who love and care for me. That is an amazing blessing.

10. What recently reminded you of how time flies?

My Uncle Nick died in January. His passing reminded me of the brevity of life, and that we need to live each day to the fullest.

11. What’s something that everyone should be able to say before they die?

That they love their parents. If they can’t get to the point of loving them, then at least be willing to consider forgiving them. Holding on to resentments is poison, and when we can do the healing work with our parents it goes a long way towards healing ourselves.

12. In one sentence, who are you?

I am a person who after many years of being in pain has a message of hope to those who need to be reminded of how wonderful they are.

13. What’s the number one life change you need to make in the next six months?

I need to be a better manager of my busy schedule.

14. What would you do differently if you knew no one would judge you?

I would follow through and start my own podcast. I have been working on the creation of it for a while but have not been able to see it to its launch yet.

15. In one word, what do you live for?

Love.