My Answers For 15 Inspiring Questions

Here’s to getting to know me a little more

I got these questions from Gurpreet Dhariwal who also shared it from Aurora Eliam, CMP, Salam Khan and Kevin Buddaeus and I loved it!

Such insightful questions into one’s life. Here is a little more of my journey and I would love to hear yours too! So please tag me if you answer as well :)

1. What’s something that nobody could ever steal from you?

My love for others and hope for the world.

The first response in my head was, ‘joy.’ And I thought about it and was like, ‘Nope, I let things steal my joy all the time.’ I think its just more of a catchy phrase. Unfortunately, my joy is snatched from me more often than I’d like.

But my love for other people has never been lost. My hope for the best has never been in doubt.

Wherever I am, back home in Indiana, where I live now in Oregon, or traveling the world, my hope is always to leave someone with a little more hope and encouragement than when I arrived and hopefully, they feel loved too because it’s true, I love you.

2. Who would you like to forgive right now?

Ooh, this is deep. Let me start off by saying, ‘I do forgive.’ I don’t hold grudges, I forgive others, but forgetting and letting go is tough for me. I dwell on things. I stew over them over and over and over again. The anxiety and stress eat at me. And I forgive again. And let the process repeat.

As some of you have read previously, I served with a non-profit in Zimbabwe for nearly 10 years. It was my heartbeat. I loved it. I worked all year long with the Portland Trail Blazers with great anticipation for summer to come when I could go back to Zimbabwe.

I went from serving, to leading teams, to joining the Board of Directors, to becoming the Vice President of the organization with succession plans of me taking over the organization.

I don’t say ‘yes’ to everything but for this non-profit, it was ‘yes’ every time and I couldn’t have been more thrilled to propel the organization forward.

During this time, I had become incredibly close with the President and Founder of the organization who became a spiritual father to me and who would call me his son.

On my last trip to Zimbabwe, where we were preparing for the transition of the organization, multiple abuse allegations arose. And me and the Founder took extremely differing positions on the matter.

Mine was full transparency, involve the rest of the Board of Directors, and protect the children at all costs. His was more of, let’s not tell anyone and just let them handle that here. I was like, ‘that’s not an option,’ we are the Board and we need to act and make sure the kids are taken care of first.

Our disagreement continued until I had a complete fallout with the organization, eventually resigning my position.

Still, in an attempt to separate differences from relationships, I called the Founder and told him I would no longer be serving on the Board of Directors but that I was so thankful for the ten years serving with the organization, for all the great relationships, and then I told him I loved him… he hung up on me.

That’s the last time we spoke.

It was so hard in so many ways. It took me about a month to release the bitterness and forgive again. It took me a year to ‘heal.’ And another year to no longer let it pain me to talk about it. Which brings me to where I am now… much healthier but still having to continuously release any negative emotions and feelings.

3. What is happiness?

It’s love. It’s joy. It’s freedom. It’s being fully you and being cool with that.

4. What impact do you want to leave on the people you love?

First off, I want to leave an impact for people, for humanity. Not just those I love. My whole aim in life is to leave people better off. I live by the Golden Rule to love others as I love myself, to treat others as I treat myself. I don’t always live up to it, but I aim. I aim to love.

5. What is life too short to tolerate?

Not chasing your dreams. We all have dreams living inside of us. I feel as if there are so many times in life, if I had hesitated, I would have missed out on incredible opportunities. Because I chased an unpaid internship, I have my dream job in the NBA. Because I ventured to spend an entire summer in Zimbabwe, I built a new life there and went back 8 more times. Because I got in my car and started driving, I got to visit parts of the United States I’d never seen.

But chasing your dreams comes at a cost. I’ve always dreamed of being a husband and a father. At age 37, those things have eluded me. Work and others came first, always. My focus was never on getting married or anything like that, hence, still single.

So some dreams have waited while others were achieved and I wouldn’t trade anything for anything. I love it all. I want it all.

6. What’s something that used to scare you, but doesn’t anymore?

Relating to people. I’m a Christian, I follow Jesus. That can scare some people right there. But it shouldn’t.

Growing up, it was more evangelistic and religious for me, like I had to convince people of something. But over time, I grew to find it all to be about love and grace. I don’t need to be scared about relating to someone because my objective isn’t to make them anything they’re not. I’m just here to simply love people for who they are and there is nothing to be scared of in that.

7. What do you want to remember forever?

The people I care about the most.

8. What do you always look forward to?

Seeing loved ones that I haven’t seen.

9. What do you appreciate the most about your life?

How many incredible friendships I have. My two sisters are two of my best friends, that’s wild in itself. I took a road trip through California with my parents and I invited them, that’s crazy. I have an accountability group of guys I’ve been doing life with for over ten years, that’s incredible.

I have another family I love dearly in Zimbabwe, I could have never imagained that. I could go on and on but the relatiosnhips I have, I could never put a price on.

10. What recently reminded you of how time flies?

Right now (quarantine), time is stuck. So interesting question. It’s my birthday in a week and I’ll turn 38. That’s crazy. I feel about 29 so… yes, time is flying.

• On a side note, that’s part of why I am so thankful to connect here on Medium. I have always loved writing but struggled to find outlets to share and this has just been absolutely incredible. No one wants to die with their stories. And I know I am still relatively young, but still, it gives me life to share the life within me.

11. What’s something that everyone should be able to say before they die?

“I’m at peace.”

The first thing I thought was, ‘I gave it everything I had’… but there is no way I could say that and I don’t think many could. But I can decide to be at peace with the decisions I’ve made and the life I’ve lived.

12. In one sentence, who are you?

THE John Ross, lol.

I am kind, compassionate, and someone who really wants to encourage and get to know you.

13. What’s the number one life change that you need to make in the next six months?

Better use of my time. I get stuck between doing too much and being lazy. Like extremes on both sides and not much in the middle. I go hard… and then I crash.

14. What would you do differently if you knew no one would judge you?

I’d dance everywhere I go.

15. In one word, what do you live for?

Others.

Matthew 22:39 Love your neighbor as you love yourself ❤️

Friends on here I would love to get to know more if you’re interested in answering the 15 Questions! … Agnes Louis, Caelyn H., Terry Mansfield, Keyondra (BRAWN) Teasley, Shamontiel L. Vaughn, Amy Marley, Lauren Baluyot, Roz Warren, FILZA CHAUDHRY, Raffaella Ferretti, Jessica Cote, Marla Bishop, Tree Langdon ♾️, Carolyn Riker, Matt Lillywhite, Simran Kankas, Hoops Concierge - Jake Fox, Paul Myers MBA, Sylvia Wohlfarth, Shweta, Mady Bartel, Graceygee, Annelise Lords, Suzanne V. Tanner, Saloni Joshi, Isak Dinesen, Lanu Pitan, Ryan Fan, Florian Führen, Michele Thill, Ann K Frailey, Chandler Ragsdale, Beth Childress, Erik Nelson, Dan J. Nelson, shweta upadhyay, Isabela Vasiliu, Wolfie Bain, Lori Brown, Noma Dek, Jean Carfantan, Jonathan Thomas, Chris Bean, Michael Murray, Charlene Fate, René Junge, John C Davis, R Tsambounieri Talarantas, Helen Cassidy Page, Besom & Bletherskite, Zachary Kerman, Robert Nelson

If you want to, you can find me on the following: LinkedIn, Instagram, Twitter, My Blog, and Patreon