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Abstract

, making me aware of imminent danger.As with everything in life, if seen from the right angle or perspective, a multitude of lessons and realisations can be yours, and with that new perspective comes an enlarged awareness of yourself, of others, and the world which leads to an instantaneous increase in happiness.Because of the obstacles I’ve experienced, the amount of content I’ve produced hasn’t been as high, and my income from the content I’ve produced has been very low.My 24 published articles on medium have so far netted me around $5, and although my YouTube has been growing more rapidly than ever before, I’m not yet eligible to join their partner program.I’ve been very fortunate to have been living off savings and the occasional odd job like gardening, babysitting, and some freelance work, however, those savings are beginning to run dry like a river flowing towards the African savannah in the dry season.This has led me to think about freelance writing, which has brought about another conflict.Should I spend time getting freelance jobs or should I go all into creating my own content, hoping that it begins to pay off soon?This is a dilemma in my life, something to which I want an answer, and going through this will help me understand how to better deal with these mental dilemmas we all face in our lives so that I can impart what I’ve learnt to others.I know that I’ll be happier solely focusing on my work compared to writing to others about topics that I’m less interested in. However, running out of money and not being able to pay my rent isn’t something that will make me happy at all. Herein lies the mental gymnastics I’

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ve been experiencing.I’ve slowly guided my mind into accepting that I may need to mix both elements together in order to move forward.Mixing the 2 together requires making progress in both, which also means I’ll be spending time on one at the expense of the other. It’s a balancing act. Standing in the middle, however, which is what I’ve often done means making a decision that doesn’t move you forward at the expense of both.Seeing it from that perspective has rekindled the fire in both directions, and this realisation is bringing me more success in each area, respectively.I’m sending out resumes on LinkedIn and messages to potential clients on other social media, and my content stats online as well as my ability to transmit information effectively are all increasing.What really helped me see all this was when I read this article by Zulie Rane where she shares how to become a full-time content creator. My energy (state) was going up tremendously as I read her words. What my energy showed me was that I desire to be that content creator that shares his ideas and learnings with people. My inner being responded positively to that.As I continued reading, a 1% shift in my thinking occurred which finally made sense to me; “Doing freelance work is simply a way to make my vision a reality. It’s part of the next step forward, not a step back.”What has helped me most is observing this play between the emotions and thoughts and looking for what makes you happier, what makes your state go up, that is the way you should go. It’s your inner intuition and if you can learn to trust that you’ll be more successful in the way you really want.</article></body>

My 22 Month Long Issue Is Finally Resolving Itself

How I became unified in my decision

Have you ever felt like you’re rotating around an issue? Round and round in loopty loops? An outward composure can oftentimes be accompanied by the harshest of mental gymnastics, with a whole world unfolding up there, with new creations and rabbit holes spawning in every far-flung corner.

“Welcome to the club” is an expression I’ve heard many times from my guru’s wife and friend, Wendy. This is the nature of the mind.

These past 22 months have been a wonderful ride infused with intense emotional realisations. Where this all started was my awakening to my desire to share the depth of wisdom I’ve realised in myself through learning under my guru Michael, tuning into my emotional states, and studying the reality around us all.

The problem arises when I try to share this with people. Immense blockages which have always dwelt in me rise to the surface almost as the guardians of my inner self, desperately trying to spare me from my escape.

Does any of this sound familiar to you?

The outside world is dangerous, they tell me, you could be seen or worse heard, and feedback can be as tough as nails and as brutal as a black mambas poison.

I’ve straddled a fine line between the unification with my desire and then switching to identifying with the obstacles as something real, making me aware of imminent danger.

As with everything in life, if seen from the right angle or perspective, a multitude of lessons and realisations can be yours, and with that new perspective comes an enlarged awareness of yourself, of others, and the world which leads to an instantaneous increase in happiness.

Because of the obstacles I’ve experienced, the amount of content I’ve produced hasn’t been as high, and my income from the content I’ve produced has been very low.

My 24 published articles on medium have so far netted me around $5, and although my YouTube has been growing more rapidly than ever before, I’m not yet eligible to join their partner program.

I’ve been very fortunate to have been living off savings and the occasional odd job like gardening, babysitting, and some freelance work, however, those savings are beginning to run dry like a river flowing towards the African savannah in the dry season.

This has led me to think about freelance writing, which has brought about another conflict.

Should I spend time getting freelance jobs or should I go all into creating my own content, hoping that it begins to pay off soon?

This is a dilemma in my life, something to which I want an answer, and going through this will help me understand how to better deal with these mental dilemmas we all face in our lives so that I can impart what I’ve learnt to others.

I know that I’ll be happier solely focusing on my work compared to writing to others about topics that I’m less interested in. However, running out of money and not being able to pay my rent isn’t something that will make me happy at all. Herein lies the mental gymnastics I’ve been experiencing.

I’ve slowly guided my mind into accepting that I may need to mix both elements together in order to move forward.

Mixing the 2 together requires making progress in both, which also means I’ll be spending time on one at the expense of the other. It’s a balancing act. Standing in the middle, however, which is what I’ve often done means making a decision that doesn’t move you forward at the expense of both.

Seeing it from that perspective has rekindled the fire in both directions, and this realisation is bringing me more success in each area, respectively.

I’m sending out resumes on LinkedIn and messages to potential clients on other social media, and my content stats online as well as my ability to transmit information effectively are all increasing.

What really helped me see all this was when I read this article by Zulie Rane where she shares how to become a full-time content creator. My energy (state) was going up tremendously as I read her words. What my energy showed me was that I desire to be that content creator that shares his ideas and learnings with people. My inner being responded positively to that.

As I continued reading, a 1% shift in my thinking occurred which finally made sense to me; “Doing freelance work is simply a way to make my vision a reality. It’s part of the next step forward, not a step back.”

What has helped me most is observing this play between the emotions and thoughts and looking for what makes you happier, what makes your state go up, that is the way you should go. It’s your inner intuition and if you can learn to trust that you’ll be more successful in the way you really want.