Mother of ilk

Summary

The poem "Mother of ilk" is a raw exploration of the author's complex relationship with his mentally ill mother, reflecting on the pain and impact of her condition on their bond and his life.

Abstract

"Mother of ilk" is a poignant poem by Edward Swafford that delves into the emotional turmoil resulting from the author's mother's mental health struggles. The piece reveals the transformation of the mother from a nurturing figure to a source of fear and confusion due to her illness. The poem conveys a narrative of betrayal and hurt as the author grapples with the loss of the maternal bond and the resentment towards the mother's altered persona. The poem also touches on the author's ongoing struggle with forgiveness and the lingering effects of their estrangement, despite the passage of time. The author acknowledges the deep personal connection to the poem, which serves as a cathartic expression of his experience.

Opinions

The author expresses a profound sense of betrayal and resentment towards his mother, whose mental health issues have irreversibly altered their relationship.
The poem reflects the author's internal conflict, caught between the love for his mother and the pain inflicted by her actions.
There is a recognition of the mother's suffering and the uncontrollable nature of her mental health condition, yet this does not diminish the author's struggle with forgiveness.
The author hints at a desire for closure and healing, but admits that this has not yet been achieved.
The piece suggests that the mother's mental illness has had a lasting and traumatic impact on the author's life, influencing his perception of family and maternal figures.
The poem implies that the mother's condition may have led to abusive or harmful behaviors, contributing to the author's deep-seated emotions of hatred and distrust.
Despite the pain, the author seems to acknowledge the complexity of the situation, understanding that his mother's actions were likely beyond her control.

Your genre changed when you became ill

Sweet memories glare at my smiling face Family photos familial lines Blurred bleeding in beseeched blue. Gone but (not) forgotten maternal foe Fading so morosely so mournfully Whiplash a quickening fade deeper, mosaic of Saccharine consciousness caving unto Maelstrom of misfiring neuronal balance beam You slipped, fell Thud. Razed and reanimated, hexing our house Instead of leering at stars Dazed and confu-conniving. YOU feted darkness. Maiden name unholy Ungodly epithet embodying destitution Bridled blood from nails brittle, deranged deeds, Unspeakable acts befell us both. Abandoned, amber-colored jars Litter begrimed floor Unsure of whether it’s you I distrust despise Or schisms of schizophrenic sadism I fucking hate/d you. Amelioration of childhood, that woman Birthed me. Who’s she? Purloined from turned page Moored in monochrome Tome, passages as poisonous as One searing stare from Your maddening eyes. Mother mother mother -STOP- breaking asunder Another twisted tirade Tyrannical maniacal iniquitous tears descend Tincture of hope?

Prescription for M. Mother? Dispensing.

Experimental titration too many to count Far too late > too far lately Adverse inaction transgressional transactions Vandal Of serene upbringing never ever after. You instilled fear fanaticized long buried beliefs One wonders; was this you all along? Subterfuge? Erased misdeeds yet The outline perspicuous and pathetic Devil’s in the detail dark djinn disguised Demoralizer get out of my face mind past Life anew genesis carnate. Which witched act of wickedness Sentenced me to Dante’s Infamous inferno of nine concentric circles Accursed antagonists of Hades Protagonist portrayed (yours truly) Embalmed With You.

POETRY | FAMILY

Mother of ilk

Your genre changed when you became ill

Thank you for reading. Many thanks to ‘Scrittura’ for publishing this piece, it is a deeply personal poem about my biological mother, and how her mental health struggles affected our relationship.

I’ve been estranged from her for over two years and it hurts more with each passing day but I can’t forgive her. Yet.

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