Summary

An author recounts unexpected and uncomfortable experiences with massages in Vietnam, highlighting cultural differences in what is considered appropriate during a massage session.

Abstract

The author, upon arriving in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, decides to indulge in a Shiatsu massage at their hotel. Initially pleased with the cleanliness and professionalism, the author is surprised when the massage takes an intimate turn, with the masseuse making unwanted advances. Despite the author's discomfort and attempts to clarify that they were only interested in a therapeutic massage, the masseuse persists, leading to an awkward conclusion. The author later learns that such experiences are not uncommon for single men in Southeast Asia and is advised to have a female companion during future massages. On a second attempt at a massage in a 5-star hotel with an older masseuse, the author encounters a more professional experience, though not without some initial apprehension.

Opinions

The author initially views the massage as a professional service but is taken aback by the unexpected intimate nature of the session.
There is a sense of cultural shock and naivety as the author grapples with the unfamiliar practices of massage in Vietnam compared to their experiences in Canada.
The author feels embarrassed and uneasy about the masseuse's behavior, particularly the unwanted sexual advances.
Despite the uncomfortable experience, the author is willing to try another massage, indicating a desire to not let one negative experience deter them from seeking therapeutic relief.
The author seems to attribute the inappropriate behavior to a misunderstanding due to language barriers and cultural differences rather than malicious intent.
The advice received from others to bring a female companion for future massages suggests a perceived norm or expectation within the local culture regarding single male tourists and massage services.

More Than A Massage

Oops, my naivete is showing

I’m not sure if I should file this under embarrassment, naivete, prudishness, or maybe I’m just… a little slow.

Exhausted after a long day of travel to Vietnam, I arrived at the hotel in Ho Chi Minh City (formerly Saigon) and was pleasantly surprised to see they offered Shiatsu massage.

It was very clean and nicely designed so I signed up immediately and they managed to squeeze me into their busy schedule. I had a shower and put on the shorts and robe they offered and the attendant led me to the cubicle through Shoji screens. There was a double-sized mattress on the floor — low lights, soft music, but no massage table with the place to put your face, like I’m used to, but whatever.

The Massage Begins

My masseuse, a young woman who didn’t speak a lot of English, came in and introduced herself and told me to take off the robe and lie face down. She got to work immediately, massaging my back and neck like a pro — using her hands, feet, elbows, and even her knees to work the tension out. She even got up and walked along my back. I could feel the tension melting away. Just what the doctor ordered.

Suddenly I gasped as she grabbed onto my shorts and yanked them down to my ankles, exposing my glutes. She then proceeded to massage… my ass. It seemed a little strange but I’m in a foreign country and not sure how they might do things here. She continued, moving up and down my legs, with my shorts still down…. and in no time was paying special attention to my… errrr… upper thigh area.

It started getting a little uncomfortable, but she then moved back up to my shoulders. I should have felt relief but she was dragging her hair along my back at the same time. Now that definitely felt strange and I know that never happened during one of my previous massages. I started to tense up, my muscles starting to feel worse than when I arrived.

She continued to work my back and legs but was getting far too close to the family jewels for my liking, massaging all around the area. She moved to my hands and arms and had them draped across her bare thighs. She was wearing a short dress, and I figured out she wasn’t wearing anything else. She sat on my butt and continued my back — no massage therapist I had ever visited had ever done that before.

Within a few minutes, she hopped off and told me to turn over. I was a little nervous but thought I might have been reading too much into it. She started on my chest, but instead of massaging my pecs… she was stroking my chest, and then suddenly she pinched my nipple — I almost hit the roof. I started to wonder if she was just being playful… damn I’m naïve.

She worked her way back down my legs and this time instead of stopping at my upper thighs she put her hands up the legs of my shorts and started massaging… my junk! I immediately sat up and said “No No”! She asked, “why no?” but I couldn’t speak Vietnamese and she couldn’t understand much English. “Just massage, just muscles” … she pouted but resumed the massage.

I just wanted to relax my muscles, like the sports or physiotherapist massages I received back in Canada... I wasn’t looking for a happy ending. I know there’s a market for that, especially in Asia, but it’s not what I was after.

She didn’t give up though and still kept trying to make her moves and I kept trying to keep it all business. When she began massaging my scalp and face (with my head resting on her thighs) she said “you number one just like monjee.” (which I figured out to be the word for penis) “You want me to massage now?” I knew what she meant and said “no, no” and at that point, I think she finally got the message and quickly wrapped things up.

I gave her a big tip, about half the rate for the massage and she asked if I could come back the next day and she would take care of “baby” and then… she kissed me! Okay, that definitely has never happened at the end of any of the other massages I’ve received.

After I got over the shock I made a beeline for the change room, got dressed as fast as lighting, and ran up to my room… asking myself the whole way “WHAT was that??”

Later I talked to a few people about it, and they all said a single man in Southeast Asia should expect that to happen, that it would be better if I brought along a woman friend, wife, or girlfriend when I booked my next massage.

My Second Vietnamese Massage

Of course, I’m traveling alone and so at the end of my big cycling journey, I really felt like I needed to work out my sore muscles so I decided to try again. This time I was staying at a 5-star hotel and the attendant was an older woman. I hoped it would go a little better this time.

We went into the cubicle and there was the massage table I was used to, a good first start. She told me to take off my clothes and get on the table… but she didn’t leave the room… and the first words out of her mouth were “you are very handsome.” Oh Oh…

She worked the muscles, putting me at ease although I must say I was a little nervous, especially when she was working my upper thighs, but she didn’t touch the goods. She did pull my underwear down and massaged my glutes, but luckily that’s as ‘intimate’ as it got. I felt great after and was glad I took a chance and tried a “therapeutic” massage again.