POETRY
Monster
A poem I never thought anyone would see

You are hurting me. Maybe not intentionally,
But, your silence hurts. Your absence hurts. Thinking about you hurts. Reminiscing about what we used to be, hurts. Seeing other people happy, hurts.
It feels like I replaced one pain for another, When I thought I had found my forever. Or maybe that is the lie I told myself to keep it all together.
You are unyielding, difficult, and sometimes, I really hate you.
My love does not appease you; it only seems to have made you harder. My tears do not soften you; they only seem to irritate you further.
You make a mockery of the pain, and sadness you cause me.
I do not think I love you. Maybe I love the idea of who I thought you were. Maybe I love the idea of being with that person. But that person doesn’t exist anymore. Sometimes, I doubt he ever did.
Where I always had your attention, now you blatantly ignore me. In your twisted way, maybe you want me, but I doubt it.
You are my abuser. You belittle me. You diminish my voice.
You are my oppressor. You debase me. You disregard my thoughts.
You make me long for you but never give yourself to me.
You make me feel pathetic, small, weak.
You are the monster in my nightmares, why can’t I let you go?






