Money As An Emotional Currency.

Henry Ford said, “Money doesn’t change people; it merely unmasks them.” Lessons from “The House of Gucci.”

What does money do to people?

It continues to amaze me how emotionally charged people get when it comes to money. Couples and families become estranged over issues around money. Governments go to war over this. Ordinary people are known to kill over this paper.

Money is paper. It often appears that money makes people do crazy things. But it’s not the money that causes the “crazy” behavior but the meaning people place on money. Money symbolizes many things. It is about security, freedom, and safety.

For Patrizia Reggiani, played by Lady Gaga in “The House of Gucci,” money gave her a sense of power, or so; she believed. And she was willing to kill when if anything or anyone threatened it.

It’s the meaning we’ve ascribed to money that dictates our behavior around money. What does money mean for you?

Your money triggers.

If you don’t believe you have any emotional charge around money. Imagine if you woke up one day and found you had no money. Maybe there is a delay in your salary arriving in your bank account. Or imagine if all the money you took years to save unexpectedly disappeared from your account.

We all have emotions around money, but they are not the same. And the feelings we have about money can change over time. A consistent income stream feels different from an inconsistent one.

Are you aware of your emotional triggers around money? How do you feel when you spend money? Do you feel anxious? What goes through your mind when you open your investment statement to find that your portfolio has dropped by 20%?

Or conversely, how would you feel if you won $1M? Maybe that would not seem like much in your part of the world. What about $10M? Would you feel any different from where you are currently?

What causes these triggers?

I vividly recall the varied reactions from my clients during the crash of 2008. It was business as usual for some, and it felt like sinking sand for others. There was little correlation between the size of their portfolio and their reactions to the drop in the value of their portfolios.

The longer they worked with me, the less emotionally reactive they were. Over time I had educated them on the workings of the markets.

We react to anything that threatens our self-worth, security, or freedom. If you relate the lack of money to any of these values, these triggers will continue to plague you no matter how much money you have.

Multimillionaires who were raised in poverty fear returning to that state. People who are have reached a level of independence because of their wealth fear that they’d have to rely on others if they were to lose all they had.

What’s the problem?

Having an emotional response to money is not wrong in itself. The problem arises when it starts to impact your life negatively; when you lose sleep over it or are constantly in conflict with your spouse over issues around money.

It’s not the lack of money that causes the emotional response to money because even individuals with a lot of money have emotional triggers around money.

It becomes a problem when it paralyzes us, stopping us from taking the necessary action to change our situation. Many women stay in unhealthy marriages for the sake of financial security. Children put up with parental demands for fear of being cut off from the Will.

What mask does your money or the lack of it allow you to wear?

In the movie “The House of Gucci,” Patrizia Reggiani reveled in the power that the Gucci name and all money that came with it gave her.

In a culture where people judge your status solely by your family background, the fear of losing the financial security or validation that money provides can affect some people’s behavior. Or does it?

As Henry Ford said, “Money doesn’t change people; it merely unmasks them.” How would it unmask you?

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