Mom Planned Her Own Birthday Party — From Heaven!

I think this writing class got put in motion from Mom’s heavenly efforts

September 23, 2021

My mom wants a birthday party this year. It appears that she’s already planning it — from heaven.

Now I know that most of you don’t know my mom. If there was one thing Mom loved, it was a party. Not any party. She didn’t especially enjoy other people’s parties. But she more than loved her parties. She loved planning them and having them. She’d spend months planning a festive bash. Sometime for no reason other than she wanted a party, so she’d plan up a special ‘Fifties Party’ or whatever occasion she could find to have a bash.

She’d plan menus and dishes. She’d plan entertainment. She’d plan the décor. Or what we all had to wear to fit in if it was a themed event. She’d plan and she’d plan — never satisfied that she had all the details covered. And even if she was on top of things, come the day before, she’d still be adding more.

Oh, my Lord, that woman loved to plan parties!

The reason I’m talking in past tense here is that last year Mom died. She turned 84 on November 10th and two days later her spirit left this earth.

So why do I claim that she’s planning a party for 2021, when she doesn’t exist in a physical body anymore?

It’s because of a city class that I scheduled a few weeks ago.

I had been teaching a few different writing classes at several different local libraries. Up until Covid.

I usually held the classes from March through October, when life wasn’t as crazy busy for everyone — or for me. The bulk of classes ended up being scheduled through the summer months.

Last year, in February 2020, I started sending out the first of my inquiries to libraries to start getting some summer classes scheduled. Usually, I start getting responses in the first few days, or a week or two after my queries. This time around I heard crickets.

By March 2020, Covid hit our nation and our world shut down. Libraries didn’t need classes because libraries weren’t open. A few were open for drive up check out, but no patrons inside the buildings.

As I write this, we’re now in 2021 and the world has opened back up — to a degree. Libraries are open again. Groups are starting to meet again. And masks are still a commonplace item of apparel.

Through all of this, I am perfectly content to not hold any classes. I’m happy with having a quieter life, and I’m not ready to start taking the risks associated with being in more places and having contact with more people. Variants of the virus are starting to escalate, and this time through, I personally know more people that have contracted Covid, been hospitalized for it, and I personally know several that have died.

I did not send out any emails to any library trying to schedule any classes this year.

But a few weeks ago, I got an email from one of the libraries I’ve taught classes at. The librarian specifically wanted my class on Writing Family Stories, for early November.

I replied and said that I’d love to hold a class, but I wasn’t driving at night anymore. When I first started teaching classes, some of them were four- or six-week classes held on a weeknight. But for the past two years, my eyes haven’t cooperated with nighttime driving. I suggested several Saturdays in October or November when I could hold a class.

The librarian replied that she was thinking about a lunch time meeting during the week, hoping to be a draw for some of the seniors in the area. She requested a specific day — November 10th.

My Mom’s birthday. The first birthday since her passing.

Out of all the days available in the fall months, and the librarian requested that specific day. To teach a class on Writing Family Stories.

I hesitated at first. I didn’t know if I could do it. Teach a class on writing family stories on my mom’s first birthday without her?

Then the magnitude of it kicked it. Mom wants a party for her birthday. And by talking about writing family stories, you know that Mom is going to come up a lot. A lot of mentions will be made about her and how I used her memories to write Fat and Sassy. I’ll talk about a trip we made together, driving to Arizona to see my son and grandkids, where we talked family memories for the entire weekend, and I came back to Texas with legal pads full of notes.

I must hold this class.

I’ll also have to give the participants a caveat at the very beginning of the class and explain the significance of the day, as a precaution so in case I burst into tears midway through the class.

In case you’re wondering why I’m putting this essay in a book about writing, it’s because it is about writing. Even if the bulk of these words are about my mom and how she loved planning a party, it also reflects how real life can affect some of our writing plans — such as holding classes.

And it also goes to show, that sometimes we put efforts out there in trying to build up certain areas of our writing career, such as holding classes to teach, and meet people, and get names for our mailing lists. Sometimes some of these efforts are productive and we end up with bookings on our calendar. Sometimes we put out feelers and don’t hear anything back and feel like we’re not moving forward with what we’re trying to do.

And sometimes, just sometimes, things fall into our lap without any attempts on our part at all.

Or, possibly, we have a mom up in Heaven trying to plan her own birthday party and her author-daughter is just a pawn in her orchestration.

Author note: I wrote this essay in 2021. Typically I would revise an older essay to reflect the current days, but in this case, the timing with Mom’s first birthday after her passing was a significant part of the story — so I left the date unchanged.

And yes, I’m scheduling this to print on November 10th, her birthday again, so that you all can read this and share in another birthday celebration with my Mom in Heaven.

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