Modern Women: March Writing Prompts

Let’s dig deep to find the treasure

Firstly, I need to apologise for the delay in getting this month’s prompt out to you. As women I know you understand the challenges of the juggling act we are all performing in which best intentions sometimes just aren’t enough. I’ve had sick children for the last week and there is nothing that shuts my productivity down faster or more completely than a vomiting child. I would imagine that is the same for every single parent.

Nevertheless, I’m here and the last week pushed an idea to the surface that I can’t wait to hear your responses to, but before I get to that… the month gone by.

In honour of February being the month of love I invited you to dive deep into all the aspects of love present in your life and as always you rose mightily to the challenge.

The editorial team gave a bumper monthly pick article last week which I strongly recommend you check out, but two that you might have missed are…

‘Love Won’t Keep Us Alive’ by Claire_Han which explores the truth that love can only do so much, especially when facing addiction in a partner.

And a piece by Jody Lynn McBrien which explored how our experience of love changes as our beliefs change and as we age. The section on physical love and a woman’s relationship to her own body and sexuality I found especially powerful.

Love is one of the hardest prompts because although we all have our own experiences of it to draw from, it is hard to write uniquely about it if you are unwilling to be vulnerable and share a part of yourself.

Let’s face it, there are only so many ways to talk about how much we love someone or have been hurt by love, but what about all the other more subtle aspects of that emotion? Love is a force that guides most of our actions from birth to death, its influence is undeniable and yet it means so many different things dependent on the circumstance.

I’m hoping you’ll keep digging into the topic and submitting your work. Feel free to tag me if you do, I know some of you are still ruminating away.

So without further chat let’s get down to what got my mind churning this week while I did my hundredth load of washing and tried to support each of my children’s needs… play.

Yup, not what you were thinking I know, but bear with me.

So, my youngest is 6. She’s sweet and hilarious but like any six year old just wants to play and play and play. Luckily her three brothers are patient for the most part and take it in turns to play online games, host tea parties and make over sessions, and most often, play with dolls. We’ve never been a gendered house so they all have an extensive doll collection.

I found myself sat on the carpet, one brother at college, another in an online class, while the last was lying in bed and trying not to be sick, and in front of me, a little girl desperate to play.

The weather was being it’s English self so outside was not an option and after a number of boardgames I surrendered to the dolls and tried my best. The thing is, it reminded me of just how hard I’ve always found playing. I can read to you for hours, play board games and do any craft or art activity you can think up, but play dolls with voices and characters, nope.

Theres a part of me behind a barrier that wants to, and knows it would be fun, but the louder half, looks with scorn at such a frivolous waste of time. There are things to be done, important things, says the voice in my head. I am rightly suspicious of that voice, I actually think it’s a little bit scared to let go and relax and just see what happens, but so far I’ve been too good at doing what I’m told and not playing.

I know that this is a sensation many mothers have but I believe it extends way beyond parenthood and into what it means to be an adult woman in today’s society.

We are conditioned to be responsible, to juggle the needs and demands of everyone close to us, to fulfil our work roles as well as our commitments to our community. Play is a luxury in this culture.

And then I wonder if that is the culture for everyone or just people of a certain age (I’m 45 in two weeks!) and whether like many other things, this too is being reclaimed from the toxic environment young people of the 80s and 90s were raised in.

I think about dopamine and how much that is in the public discourse now and I wonder if that has changed the way we perceive play and pleasure. Pleasure which is usually confined to sexuality but for our children is focused purely on the desire to play and feel good. Can we change the word associations that pop up when pleasure is mentioned?

So the prompt for March is play, what does the word mean to you? How easy do you find it to play with your children if you have them, and if you find it hard, why and is there guilt in that?

What does play mean for adults?

Why do we look down on gamers?

Why aren’t sports, team and individual more popular amongst adult women?

We think of ‘boys and their toys’ in reference to grown men, but what are women’s toys?

A few quotes to mull over…

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” ― George Bernard Shaw

“Almost all creativity involves purposeful play.” ― Abraham Maslow

“Sure you do. Everyone wants to play. They’re just afraid of looking stupid. But you know what’s stupid? Not trying. So just…try..” ― Victoria Scott, The Collector

“The opposite of play isn’t work. It’s depression.” ― Jane McGonigal, Reality is Broken: Why Games Make Us Better and How They Can Change the World

As always the questions and nudges I’m offering you are just suggestions and I hope that one of them sparks something within you that wants to come to the surface and be shared.

It’s important to be aware that some of these questions may open doors to stories you are not quite ready to share, that’s okay and I urge you to be compassionate with yourself and tread gently.

Consider writing for yourself. As a practice writing is the greatest therapy that we can access privately at a time and place that suits us and I think most of us experience a need to talk through our thoughts before answers crystalise and those ‘aha!’ moments can be achieved. Allow whatever needs to arise to come up and flow out of your pen, or as your fingers fly across the keys of your computer. Decide later what you feel comfortable with sharing with the Modern Women community and the wider Mediumverse.

The world we live in has very clear ideas about how we should show up, the space we are allowed to inhabit and the images we should present of ourselves. In breaking down some of those rules we not only release ourselves but we offer permission to others still trapped and provide language for those who struggle to find their voices as they nod emphatically, with eye glistening and whisper ‘me too.’

Our shared experience as women bridges all divides of culture, religion, race, and geographic location. Your words are the passports to each other, and I cannot wait to read the journeys you will take us on.

For those new to our monthly prompts please note that they are open to you not just for the month in which we release them but for whenever they strike a cord of inspiration within you, so feel free to look back through previous months.

Whether you respond to one of the questions I pose or the overall theme in your own way is entirely up to you, and we welcome work in any style, whether that is poetry, prose, fiction or an essay. The choice is yours.

Our only request is that you share genuine, heartfelt and down-to-earth stories that you think other women might be inspired or empowered by.

If you are submitting a response to a prompt, please include the tag ‘prompt’ when sending it to us and add a link at the bottom of your piece to the prompt you are responding to.

If you’ve never written for Modern Women before, then please do take a moment to read our ‘how to’ guide below.