Despite the ease of use, technology is not, and never will be, your friend

Mistext

Lost Love Week

FRIDAY NIGHT AT THE RUSTY SPOKE and the patrons were cutting loose, emptying their wallets at the bar, running up tabs at the tables, keeping the kitchen staff on their toes with orders for burgers, rings, chili cheese fries, more burgers, more rings. Of course, they’d also flocked to the dance floor, bumping and squeezing, blocking the paths of patrons who’d drunk one too many and desperately needed access to the restrooms.

A normal Friday night until Rick Wadd (known to his friends at Dick) kicked open the doors and led his sidekick Cash to the bar. He leaned one elbow on the edge and checked out the women. “Pabst and a bump of Jack.” He slapped a twenty on the counter.

Cash tugged his sleeve. “Better go slow, Dick. You’re probably at twice the legal limit already.”

Dick swiveled on his stool and locked eyes with Cash. “And who made that rule? Did you make that rule?” He poked Carl’s chest. “Fuck the rules. Tonight, I’m making the rules.” He nodded over his shoulder. “See the blonde at the end of the bar? Let me show you how to make the rules.”

He swaggered to the end of the bar, perched his hip on the ledge, and pulled out his wallet. He laid two more twenties on the bar. “Free drinks all night for one dance.”

Dick swiveled on his stool and locked eyes with Cash. “And who made that rule? Did you make that rule?” He poked Carl’s chest. “Fuck the rules. Tonight, I’m making the rules.”

She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the dance floor. Dick yanked her back. “Not there. Right here. I seen your act at the Kiss-N-Ride lounge. You don’t even have to take your clothes off, cause I’m a married man.”

Cash reached for Dick’s elbow. “Think twice, good buddy. What happens if Magnolia finds out? She said one more time and she’ll kick you out faster than a horny tom mounts a cat in heat.”

Dick pushed Cash away. “She don’t know what I’m up to, and who’s going to tell her?”

The woman pushed Dick onto a stool, turned her back to him and lap danced to the music, hiking her skirt to her hips as she dipped lower. Dick slipped his hand under her blouse. Cash couldn’t resist. He snapped the scene on his phone and texted it to their friend Axel with the message, “Look at the pile Dick’s shitting now.”

The stripper removed Dick’s hand and slapped him away. He shrugged. “I said you didn’t have to take your clothes off. I didn’t say I couldn’t play with your buttons.”

Dick slipped his hand under the blonde’s blouse. Cash couldn’t resist. He snapped the scene on his phone and texted it to their friend Axel with the message, “Look at the pile Dick’s shitting now.”

She adjusted her skirt, finished her tequila, and snatched the twenties from the bar. “No need to tip,” she snapped and stuffed them into her blouse before shaking her hips toward the exit.

Dick gave Cash a thumbs up, slapped the bar, and shouted, “Set me up again.”

Cash wondered why Axel hadn’t texted back, so he texted again. The message window popped up. “What text? What pictures?”

Cash scratched his head and texted back. “Check your messages.”

As soon as he hit send, a message from Dick’s old lady Magnolia appeared. “Tell that cheating bastard if he shows his face around here again, I’ll blow his balls off with his shotgun.”

Oops.

He approached Dick carefully and fessed up, showing him the mistext. “Sorry, buddy, but you’re busted.”

As soon as Cash hit send, a message from Dick’s old lady Magnolia appeared. “Tell that cheating bastard if he shows his face around here again, I’ll blow his balls off with his shotgun.”

Dick tucked Cash’s phone into his shirt pocket. “I make the rules, not Magnolia. Without me she’d be broke and lonely. I got nothing to worry about.” The bartender laid Dick’s beer and bump next to his elbow. Dick poured the bourbon and swallowed half the mug. “Worry about something important, good buddy.”

Christ, Cash thought. He’s gonna be a bear to hang around with when he finds out she was serious about kicking him out. Then, upon further consideration, he pondered how long it might take before she’d be open to some good old, Southern fried, down home comforting from Dick’s best bud.

continued tomorrow…

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