Medium, How Do I Love or Loathe Thee? Let Me Count the Ways

Love or Loathe contest prompt for What Is Love to You?

I’m addicted to Medium.

No other platform has captured my interest this much.

Here are some reasons why.

It’s the Most Progressive Platform I’ve Seen

Even the rare jerks here, are politer than most trolls on Facebook and Reddit.

I can be out as gay, trans, nonbinary, aromantic, asexual, and autistic, and no one bats an eyelid!

An Awesome Place to Find Like-Minded Folks

It can be lonely sometimes. I have writer friends and queer trans friends, but not many are in both groups.

But here, I found fellow queer trans writers, such as KP_the_writer, Logan Silkwood, Jenny Starr✨, Stephenie Magister, Alistair J. Kraft, and Jymi Cliche.

It’s wonderful to connect with other poets, too, like Shereen Bingham, Marilyn Glover, Desarae Black, Jenny Starr✨, and Alistair J. Kraft.

I got C grades in my poetry analysis papers when I was an English major (my other major was psychology). So the encouragement from friends here has boosted my confidence so much.

I also enjoy chatting with Kiki Lu Johnson, my fellow erotica buddy. Okay, I haven’t published any erotica yet, but if I do, I’ll be using another name!

Empathic, Supportive Audiences

A while ago, I took the plunge to write about being aromantic, and I was nervous about how people would react.

I had confided in some friends, especially TzeLin Sam, about my love for my crush. I never corrected anyone when they thought I wanted a romantic relationship. So I feared that people would hate me for “lying.”

I was wrong!

My friends were very supportive. I actually grew closer to them because they got to know me on a deeper level. Even friends who were not aromantic, could empathize with my feelings.

In fact, Medium readers seem to favor personal stories over listicles. Art Bram explains in moving detail why heartfelt, personal articles are so riveting.

Open-Minded Readers Even for Unconventional Experiences

When I entered the Love Your Mother contest last month, I confessed that I don’t love my mother anymore. I thought people would loathe me for this, because we’re supposed to love our moms, right?

No. Everyone’s story is different.

It touched me that readers were so understanding and nonjudgmental.

Logan Silkwood related to my grief of coming out as transgender to unaccepting parents.

Sally Prag and Kiki Lu Johnson were moved to write about their own mothers. Kiki’s “Feeling Empty on Mother’s Day” and Sally’s “My Dance with the Topsy-Turvy Love of a Mother,” made me feel much less alone.

Moreover, Robert Ralph taught me by his example, that even if society will judge you for your experiences, you can still tell your story in a way that readers can understand and connect with.

I was especially touched by Robert’s interview, where he was so candid and open about his life.

Daring and Compassionate Writers

There are writers here who are both brave and kind in sharing opinions that not everyone will like.

Gerald Sturgill told us a shocking tale from his time in the student union. A male colleague framed him for sexual harassment, as he saw Gerald as his rival. It’s important to take victim testimony seriously, but sadly, false allegations can and do happen.

James Finn countered the assumption that gay white men are so privileged. Through news reports and studies, he shows us that gay white boys still suffer from abuse and assaults in schools, churches, workplaces, and families. Homophobia is still very much alive today.

Justjulieandherblog spoke earnestly about her views on the Amber Heard vs Johnny Depp lawsuit. She laments that male victims of domestic abuse are often not believed.

I admire all of these writers for having the courage to write about their perspectives, even if some people may dislike their opinions.

Communicative Editors

In a typical publication outside of Medium, you get generic rejections with no feedback. I understand that editors are swamped with submissions, but it’s still disheartening to have no idea why you missed the mark.

But on Medium, many editors are generously open in their communications, so even if you get rejected, you’ll know why.

Susie Pinon from The Orange Journal wrote a detailed guide on formatting rules. She added that they will write private notes on why a submission was rejected.

The editors of New Writers Welcome are also transparent with their communications and will tell you the reasons for rejection. Erica Marie, one of the editors, told me in the comments of her article, that new writers may struggle to get the formatting right.

Fortunately, I was quick in learning how to format my articles properly, and this was largely because Susie’s guide was so thorough!

Speaking of great editors, I want to give a special thank you to KP_the_writer from Queerly Trans. They gave me a lot of help to make sure I didn’t write problematic statements in my latest piece. I was grateful because the topic was a sensitive one that I was not familiar with–BDSM in a gay and trans story.

What Do I Loathe About Medium?

They removed the editing function on the apps.

I don’t like to use my laptop, as it crashes so often. So it’s a shame that I can’t use my phone or tablet to edit anymore.

Plus, Medium is not registering all our read stats, so I have several articles with more fans than reads!

Lastly, though most folks on Medium are warm-hearted and sincere, I’ve also met some who have been spamming copy-and-paste comments on our posts. Lindo Shandu has written a passionate article about this issue.

Thankfully, these issues do not take away from my enjoyment of this lovely platform. I’ve grown substantially as a writer and a person. I’m braver, stronger, and more articulate than I ever was before.

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