Managing a New Team? 3 Effective Ways to Build Meaningful Relationships

Starting a new job is always a mix of excitement and concerns; you never know what type of people you will encounter! Even if you are not a new manager, you have to consider an overwhelmingly amount of things to ensure that you build a good relationship with your new team.

Below I explore three effective practices that can help managers to ease in into new teams and lay the foundation for meaningful relationships. Without further ado, here they are:

• Give thoughtful feedback
• Avoid groupthink
• Promote social interactions

Give thoughtful feedback

Giving feedback is a huge part of being a manager. Sometimes it can be difficult; nevertheless, it has many benefits. Not only it’s essential to build lasting relationships, but also it demonstrates that you have a genuine interest in your team’s growth.

Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook’s COO, says that when a culture of honest feedback doesn’t exist, no one tells anyone what is really happening; instead, they talk behind each other backs.

Consequentially, uncomfortable issues never get addressed, and resentment builds up; this doesn’t mean that you have to go about being brutally honest every time you have a chance.

In her book Lean In, Sheryl states that feedback should be given from a non-threatening place and to achieve that, we first need to recognize “that we can see things only from our own perspective and that there’s no absolute truth”. Our goal should be to avoid a defensive response and trigger discussions instead of disagreements.

Rather than pointing out what the other person did or didn’t do, focus on emphasising how it makes you feel. Sheryl mentions Fred Kofman, a former MIT professor and author of Conscious Business, and says that “great leadership is “conscious” leadership.”

To reinforce trust and demonstrate care, once someone starts talking, make sure to listen with intent. As well said by Kim Scott “listen with the intent to understand versus to respond”.

Avoid groupthink

In his book Originals, the organizational psychologist Adam Grant explains groupthink as “the tendency to seek consensus instead of fostering dissent”; the likelihood of this happening is higher in companies that don’t champion the diversity of thoughts, background and experiences.

When joining a new team, it’s easy for managers to fall into the trap of listening whoever speaks louder; it’s the manager job to build a strong culture that welcomes dissent and make people confident to express their ideas.

Groupthink promotes an environment that’s not rooted in transparency and trust; therefore, you must avoid it. Grant argues that there’s always a risk that a viewpoint won’t go unchallenged and, as a result, people might feel pressured to conform to the dominant, default view leading to complacency and lack of novel solutions.

To overcome this challenge, make sure to schedule regular one-to-ones; especially in early interactions with a new team, this is essential to establish trust and ensure everyone knows you are listening to what they have to say.

In my quest to avoid groupthink, I also resorted to Design Thinking. For instance, when I lead brainstorming sessions, instead of having open discussions at first, I ask everyone to write down their ideas in post-its.

Afterwards, the team does a collaborative exercise to cluster the ideas into themes; only then, we have open discussions. It’s a great exercise that ensures all opinions are taking into consideration, with no exception.

Promote social interactions

It doesn’t need to be a night out, even a breakfast every Friday can do the trick! Scheduling bonding time with your team is essential because it allows you to show your whole self, not just your work persona, and encourage everyone else to do the same.

It’s a more empathetic approach that it’s linked directly to how you demonstrate care and speak truthfully to your team and peers. This interesting article from Forbes says that social interactions in the workplace in addition to “fostering an environment that supports mutual respect, trust and belonging among peers”, also increase engagement and loyalty, reduces stress and inspire positivity, among other benefits.

I used to work at a place where everyone used to have their meals alone at their desks. It seemed a harmless habit, but this behaviour revealed a lack of connection between the team and, as a result, the team worked in silos.

I saw an opportunity there, so I started to invite them for breakfast every morning, and eventually, it became “our thing”. The team got more comfortable and friendly with each other, which enabled the growth of a more trusting and collaborative relationship — I was so proud of them!

Socializing is possible even in a remote work situation. Touch base with your team, investigate how each one of them prefers to be contacted (with or no camera?), make sure to keep information and conversations open to everyone. The key is to ensure you include them on the process of how things will be done.

How about holding a virtual session to define the rules and guidelines on how the team will tackle remote work? Promote a collaborative virtual environment, get in the habit of sharing everything, and they will feel even more connected.

Conclusion

The fundamental basis for meaningful relationships, that tie all the points above, is authenticity. If you don’t express a genuine and authentic attitude towards the actions discussed in this article, the result will be the opposite of what you expect.

I am a firm believer that transparency goes a long way and, as pointed out in this Harvard Business Review article, the time is up for toxic workplaces.

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