12/20/21 Muddy Notes

Madcap, Hyperbolic, or Shambolic Minutes — You Be the Judge

We stopped to pick up a leaf in the road

My notes are particularly fragmentary and weird this week. Read at your own risk. BOF shared his notes, which didn’t lessen the weird, but thanks, Paul — I enjoyed figuring out the upside-down one.¹ BOF’s first note was:

Andrew is Fabio. Susan is so serious.

She’s been busy with classes. AI, democracy. I failed to write down what Susan said about the future of our democracy. She got 100 on a “shitty” paper — her words — and gets worse grades on papers she thinks are better. She lacks perspective on her own papers. Gary has experienced the same.

Dikkers’ Funny Filter of the Week: #5 — Hyperbole

Gary

screen-shared his example and admits he’s now trying to use screenshots of public domain movies as featured pictures whenever possible.

Amy

lost her stepfather last month — our condolences, Amy — and Susan pointed out Amy’s name listed in his New York Times obit. Amy’s mother was famous for her parties. No byline, sorry, Amy. Susan helped Amy screen-share her hyperbole example. BOF’s notes say Amy is crabby. She’s learning to share — when she’s not giving us the finger. Hot Dawg has a weird nose & is famous.

Andrew

created obituaries for the mob, per BOF’s note. Carol too.

Susan said

• “Gary, Amy, those are excellent examples of hyperbole run amok”
• “They get all nostalgic & weepy & shit at the end of the year”

Who gets weepy & shit, and how does that relate to hyperbole? Who knows? My next note is

How to romanticize the last year?

“How would you do that?”

Amy asked, philosophically. So I think we’d quickly moved on to wondering what people will write about at year-end. Carol can see silver linings.

BOF’s notes say

“Hallmark Harlequin.” Andrew got beamed up.

Should MuddyUm register as a nonprofit?

Returning to Earth, Andrew pointed out Slack has reached the maximum of 10K searchable messages at our level. Should we upgrade? Nonprofits don’t have a 10K searchable messages ceiling. Susan: People have all this money at end-of-year, looking for someplace to put it. We already have an appropriate nonprofit purpose: “to promote laughter in the world.”

Susan is considering it for real. “People do things for nonprofits,” per Andrew. Carol — 501(c)(3)? We’re voting, I think on whether we agree the Cap’n should look into nonprofitability? Paul says we must use our real names. Motion carried; BOF abstained.

Carol cautioned, “look into taxes!” How would we choose board members? Andrew is running down a pro bono lawyer. Gary says boards have a minimum of five members.

We are not alone

An artist in Brooklyn, NY, has trademarked Muddyum®.

Questions, comments, concerns

• “What is our big picture goal?” asks Amy. Did anyone answer?
• Yes! BOF’s notes say: We want to make MuddyUm a more stable pub. Our name is a Medium in-joke. Then he noted, “Carol is old too now,” which I very much doubt
• “What’s the difference between a church and a nonprofit?” someone asks. Discussion ensued. “Maybe we should be a church!” exclaims first Susan, then a few beats later Holly, as her brain caught up with her notes
• Carol looked up IRS Code under 501(c)(3) and listed off four categories of nonprofit purpose: religious, educational, charitable, scientific
• Susan: “We should study the Consumer Reports model and study the four categories for distinguishing features. Look at mission statements and find the best match with Muddy”

We’re here to share the good news — here’s our pamphlet! We’ll go door-to-door looking for converts! — Andrew

Even panhandlers these days have VenMo. — Carol

• Gary: “We should study the Funny Times newspaper model! We live in funny times. Bev Potter and Roz Warren write for them.” Their submissions process is old-fashioned — print & submit via mail, or drive to a drop-off box
• Amy: “Leaf in the middle of the road.” She’s returning to her big picture goal question, trying to focus on what’s important to make Muddy better known. Wish I’d written down her exact wording. I’m guessing here:

How busy is the road? Will a car hit you while you’re picking up the leaf? Why pick up a leaf? A leaf is not a $100 bill.

• BOF, getting back to business, says he’s editing something on Contemplate, a sister pub
• Andrew: BOF may need to reject it if it’s too funny

MuddyUm Leaks Its Wikidreams

Wikipedia’s qualifications for article worthiness are very anal, per BOF’s note. Who lists us in print, outside Medium? Susan mentioned Points in Case, a literary humor publication, as another model to study. We need to approach our local papers about mentioning MuddyUm. Do we need a Google Sheets spreadsheet to track applicable links and publications? Scan images and upload too?

High jinks

BOF’s notes wonder whether we Mudditors will ever be Wikiworthy. What about our doppelganger?

Andrew too is brooding about that ®artist® in Brooklyn. He’s amazed Susan nonchalantly proposes to talk with the other Muddy woman. Andrew is looking for weapons.

Susan spoke about something I didn’t write down. It must’ve been funny, because Carol — who was multitasking — fell off her chair, but is OK and is snorting with laughter now. Does Carol have a clapper? BOF noted this too, saying Carol has fallen and she can’t get up. Susan knocked Carol out of her seat. Call 9–1–1.

Were pseudonyms mentioned? My next note is “B.O. Face.” That Paul. He’s such a card. Of the Old Maid grade level.

Questioning Our Future as an Organization

Gary: It’s entropy. Andrew: It’s not entropy. He said what it really is, but I didn’t write it down because I thought I’d remember it. We must’ve referred back to nonprofits, because Andrew reiterated, “messages over 10K will fall off,” which is no big deal.

Susan mentioned talking about the future of democracy at the beginning of our meeting, but why, I don’t remember. BOF noted, Susan is bumming us out. Then Gary brought us back to life.

Is Paul having a stroke? someone wondered, based on his Zoom appearance. We need an “ICE” — In Case of Emergency — document for Zoom meetings! No, I’m just a grumpy old man, BOF insisted.

Carol: There you go with that aging shit. Amy: I don’t believe in aging. Andrew: We’re all 23. Carol: 33 minimum. I didn’t speak up because writing but would choose 43, personally.

Dikkers’ Funny Filter for Next Week: #9 — Madcap

Andrew is on point. BOF is working on a madcap piece about COVID — stay tuned.

Body parts might as well be on each Muddy meeting agenda

Remarks were flying fast and furiously and I’m sure I missed several.

• Carol: something about penises. I wrote down “no one can look at their penis the same way again after Carol’s comments”
• Foreskin omelets. “OMG, Andrew”
• Gary: King David and Saul. Proof! Bring back the foreskins!
• Susan: Madcap = hallucinogenic mushrooms
• Andrew: I can’t have an omelet for lunch now
• Susan: Andrew’s going vegan after this meeting. Accept it and move on! Own what you’re eating!

Anchovies. Foreskins. Amy is now starving. So is Susan.

BOF, the unofficially designated serious one this week, said Rhode Island is getting hammered by COVID. He and his wife are awaiting PCR test results.

Someone said “these are madcap minutes. Hyperbolic or shambolic minutes?” People kept saying, “someone write that down” and “did anyone write that down?” I’m trying but fear I left out some zingers. How’s this for an idea? Everyone write down their own “best lines” during each meeting, then I could concentrate on the unfunny stuff. Then no one would read my notes, then I’d stop taking notes. Hmm.

Dikkers vs. dicks

Susan is the best-educated comic among us. She’s taken all of Scott Dikkers’ classes, along with improv classes and masterclasses and Great Courses. The best humor writers are depressed inside.² There’s no overall institute for humor as a lifestyle.

• Gary: There’s no unified theory of comedy

There’s a science to humor. Are we a scientific institute, studying the theory and practice of humor? A humor systems laboratory?

• BOF: How to kill the humor!

Humor and comedy have very narrow windows and niches. History →theory →practice →tools that go into the practice.

• Gary: Humor fashions — dialect and other things that were funny in other eras are no longer considered appropriate. Comedy and pedagogy are similar
• Carol: “Women aren’t funny” — with reference to an article by Kyrie Gray, I think, which I couldn’t find. Several female humorists were discussed— Ellen DeGeneres, Paula Poundstone
• Amy: That’s nothing new
• Carol: Dicks are funny, but they’re not attractive
• BOF: That’s why there are no mirrors above the urinal in men’s bathrooms

• Gary: Prompt idea! Madcap humor about penises
• Andrew’s “cap” was taken from him, so he can’t be madcap. Carol asks if he has the fireman’s helmet
• Amy’s never written a penis article
• Andrew will have insomnia tonight

Everyone signed off abruptly. Talking about penises must be enervating. Writing about them and butts and boobs is odd. I envisioned learning about landscaping and gardening in retirement and never saw funny business bearing down on me.

¹ BOF’s upside-down writing says: There can be different streams, Robots TO W→ with an arrow pointing to the word models, which is underlined. I’m guessing W stands for Wikipedia. How robots enter in escapes me. Turns out it’s a reminder/writing prompt to himself and it’s TGW not TO W. TGW = Things Get Weird.

² Now you tell me! I’ll never get back all those hours I spent looking on the bright side and trying to be cheerful. I’m usually cheerful without trying now.

Attendees besides me and Susan Brearley: Andrew Rodwin, Baskerville Old Face (BOF), Carol Lennox, Amy Sea, and Gary Chapin. Sarah Paris beamed in briefly from Uranus.

¡Felices fiestas!, amigos! Past meeting notes are here:

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed my nonsense. If you’d like to support me as a writer, there are two ways. To receive my stories via email, click here. Not yet a Medium member? Sign up via my referral link here. Unlimited access to Medium is excellent cheap entertainment at just $50 a year or $5 a month.