Loving someone unavailable

Tears, sorrow, pain, unending suffering and nights spent awake. Crying until you suffocate without finding any meaning in the pain that you are experiencing. Reading all the internet sources to find something soothing or that could explain why you experience what you experience and what to do about it really. When you know deep inside your heart that what you feel is real and deep, powerful and valuable being met with the opposite feeling is excruciating. No wonder so many people commit suicide because of it, because if this feeling feels like death why not end it quicker.

It takes years to recover from a rejection and seeing the underlying issues and deeper layers of your self and the other person involved is not an easy task.

If you choose to use hypnosis and psychotherapy you could get some results. Also alternative energy healing modalities are a way to deal with this.

But, something remains deeper than any depths on this topic of rejection and something always remains untouched, it’s like something is missing and you cannot really put the pieces together. You can surely agree that your childhood traumas are being reflected back to you or that the person you love and rejects you projects their own traumas into the situation, but it’s like this rejection is more real than anything and it goes only so deep. In fact, it’s like there isn’t an end to it.

I am sure anyone who has experienced this knows exactly what I am talking about. I think it can be as painful as being or not being together with that person and actually having a relationship. In fact, sometimes it can be even more painful if you don’t get to know them because you don’t understand the reasons behind like if you were to actually know the person and know their defaults.

I think that as a collective we still have to progress towards finding real healing modalities and practices which can help us overcome the trauma of rejection. Something in our approach doesn’t quite fit into the equation.

If you think about it we are trapped in our approach in this contradiction of you being responsible for how other people react and you not being guilty and their reaction being actually “their karma”. In fact, there is a mix between the two but until you discern which emotions are yours to heal and which are theirs, you end up in a hole with all the emotions being yours to heal and to carry.

Maybe because the ones who reject hold the supremacy emotionally speaking. If you can remember, you being at the other end of the stick is less of a burden than being the one rejected and you can find so many reasons for which you reject but when you are rejected you cannot find any valid reasons for which you might end up being rejected although there are so many. It could be because we should be more tolerant towards other people even if we don’t love them back and because it’s more unethical to reject than to be rejected and surely blaming someone for wanting you too much isn’t a way to go about things. But you know, there could be even more reasons than just a dance between two broken personalities who don’t get to stand each other in reality but can’t disentangle themselves completely either. There could be reasons like karma, maybe it does really exist, and in other lifetimes you have wrongdoings towards that person who just can’t find the empathy and compassion to stand you in this lifetime, or maybe very deep generational trauma reasons encoded in our DNA out of which we cannot stand particular traits that we notice in other persons according to our specific ancestors’ lineage.

Finding the decency and the ability to inquire beyond any humiliation and unfairness that you experience in the situation and seeing beyond the main soul wounds which are: rejection, abandonment, humiliation, betrayal and injustice could help you but somehow that cannot help you take the psychosomatic effects of the rejection and the holes in your being, whether they were done upfront or covertly, out of yourself because they seem to tie on to your very core. It’s wrapping your whole identity around rejection which can be the most detrimental thing. The people who reject you seem to know you the most, or at least that is the illusion which you are encountering, and maybe they do, maybe they see you more deeply than you can meet yourself at that time and maybe this is why it’s so frustrating for you. A part from not being able to heal that aspect of yourself by yourself, it’s like someone else who sees it and could help you heal it comes and destroys you even more before you even get to notice that very thing.

I also read a lot that rejection doesn’t exist. That indeed we are all connected through Love in the higher realms. Or that you must accept it and let go of it.

There are a lot of biases of people who seem to just have forgotten the feeling and not truly having found healing. And I am saying this because if I was to be super clingy and insistent towards a healer or a lightworker he would apply to me the very same treatment. Then they would justify how rejection is a powerful tool and something which can help you find freedom. But if you want to find freedom from rejection which tools would you use then?

You know, it’s frustrating and for sure sad, but certainly we haven’t surpassed the issues of rejecting and being rejected and the troubles of human heart resonance and not matter how much we want to prove others that we have dealt with our unaccomplished desires we end up punishing the people who feel more and desire more than we have managed to carve our identities through suppressing our own desires. I see so many people who teach about rejection but can’t deal with someone expressing a difference of opinion let alone with being rejected to their very core just as I see so many people who might have answers but they just can’t express them anymore.

I strongly believe that until you find that satisfactory answer to Why is it that you suffer, that this person whom you love so much responds in this negative manner to you? you will not have surpassed the problem of rejection because it’s something deeper than taking a blue pill and playing Mr or Ms Healed, Integrated and Moral with people who “just can’t seem to get over it”(should they own it already).