Looking For Stability in This Chaotic World
What are you doing when the world is falling apart? Or when your life is falling apart?
The world is dangerous. There is no proof that you’re going to stay alive. In the same way, there is no proof you’re not going to end up alone, experience pain, or lose. I’m writing mostly about physical danger, but the topic is much broader. There are hundreds of different reasons to feel scared and anxious. The main idea still applies. Whether you are experiencing anxiety in front of people or after getting a bad look from your doctor.
Throughout history, probably from the very beginning, people were trying to find something to hold on to. They just had to. Without believing you’re safe, you won’t be able to live. Maybe exist, but not live. And I say ‘believing’ because it is all there is.
Humanity has created a plethora of illusions of safety. Our security systems, police, antibiotics, walls, gloves, rules, laws, social agreements, or even God. You are lucky if those structures have remained intact throughout your life. Then you had nothing to worry about, so you’ve filled your life with something more pleasant than pure survival. But a lot of people aren’t that lucky. They must find a way to live knowing the danger is all around them.
People say those securities made us weak. But I don’t think so. I think they made us doubt. Many of us think we won’t be able to handle anything extreme. We also believe we have the power to prevent absolutely everything painful. Until the day comes.
When you see the thing you’ve been so afraid of face to face. There is a possibility it will hurt you, maybe even hurt you badly. You will end up wounded. Then you will get used to the wound. Then the wound is going to start healing. You are going to deal with the consequences of this thing one by one. Somehow every day you’re going to feel better. More nice things are going to fill your attention. And that is it. You’re done. Life goes on.
What if, as a consequence, you die? Then you won’t have to deal with any of that stuff.
One thing I can tell you for sure — dealing with a problem is way easier than living every second of your life in anxiety. Because, you know, worrying about something doesn’t prevent it from happening!
Unfortunately or fortunately, I didn’t learn it from books. As much as I wanted my grandma to live forever, she didn’t. My friends who have been the pillar of my sanity are no longer my friends. People whom I loved changed. And now living in Ukraine during the war, thinking the next missile can land in my home, knowing I can die like anyone else any day, definitely taught me something.
Until you’re presented with an opportunity you have no idea what you’re capable of. Somewhere inside of you lives the wisdom of thousands of generations who have lived through more than you could possibly imagine. In the most extreme scenario, it will most likely take over.
Strong people are those who got to know that they are strong.
Weak people are those who still have to learn it.
Holding on to an illusion of stability or safety is a prison. You’re not able to move anywhere from it, aren’t you? Especially, seeing stability in unstable things. It is like a prison inside of a prison. The government and the system we have built can collapse very fast. People always change. Your relationships are going through all kinds of stages. One day they make you the most joyful, the next — they are just gone. Faith is not helpful when it’s dependent on people as well. It can be hard to believe something that everyone considers a lie. Escaping from reality doesn’t really help with living in reality.
It may seem like there is not a single stable and secure thing you can hold on to when you’re afraid or lost. And that’s true. Every single separate thing comes and goes, exists and dies. But the unity of them doesn’t. The world has been living and breathing long before you came here. You are part of it for a very short period of time. So, please, go, LIVE a little bit.