Living Out Loud
Alive With Sexual Energy
Last night the moon was still pretty full and James and I decided to go out for a swim. We’d just finished watching a hilarious comedy special from Iliza Shlesinger on Netflix and I’d laughed until my sides hurt and tears were running out of my eyes. A skinnydip under the moon seemed like the next natural thing. We stripped off our clothes, transferred our wine into acrylic glasses, and wrapped some towels around us before heading out into the side yard.
Our yard is on a corner lot and is somewhat private, especially under cover of darkness, but there is always a risk that after you drop your towel and before you get all the way into the water, a car might come down the street and catch you in its headlights. We aren’t exhibitionists and scoot into the pool as quickly as possible, but it doesn’t stop us from doing it. Skinny dipping just feels too good! I set up some tunes and as we slipped into the water, Elle King’s America’s Sweetheart began to play.
My kind of medicine is whiskey straight I got a mouth to put you in your place, and they They said I’ll never be the poster type But they don’t make posters of my kind of life
So kick out the jams, kick up the soul Pour another glass of that rock and roll Turn up the band, fire in the hole Gonna lose control tonight
I stood by the edge of the pool, sipping my wine and dancing a bit to the music. James was pressed in behind me and I was rubbing my ass against him.
“Look at that moon,” I said, admiring the orange orb that had recently risen above the tree line and marveling at it’s unusual color. “She’s just beautiful tonight!”
“Yes, she is,” James agreed, kissing my neck. “It’s quite a moon” and he gave my ass a little squeeze as he said it and we both chuckled. I turned around to face him and wrapped my legs around his hips and we continued that way for a while, just talking and kissing and feeling each other’s bodies close together.
Neither of us is big on actual PIV in the water, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t enjoy each other still. After all, sexual energy isn’t only about coitus. In fact, it doesn’t even necessarily have to be about sex at all. Sexual energy is simply life force energy. It’s the generative juice of the Universe and that juice isn’t only for making babies; it’s about creating love and intimacy, but also art, music, literature and in truth, new endeavors of any kind. It’s a sustaining force, but also a healing and a nurturing one and we revel in it whenever we can.
The past few days had been stressful and busy. I hadn’t slept well due to all the full moon/eclipse energy going on, and truth be told, we’d been a bit testy with each other. But one of the things that we know about our relationship is that when we are getting on each other’s nerves, it means we haven’t had enough time together as a couple to really connect. Making that time to cultivate joyful togetherness goes a long way towards feeling back on track and in the flow again. Laughing together; sharing some wine, being naked together outside — those are all things that help us to engage with that joyful, generative, connected kind of energy.
Nathaniel Rateliff’s Shake came on and I can’t not dance to that song and so I began moving around the pool, hips swaying, hands swirling around my head, adding in some moves that I wouldn’t do in a public setting. I cupped my breasts and my hands caressed my hips and ass, all the while keeping time to the seductive beat and reveling in the gaze of my beloved as he watched me dance. When the song was done, I went over to him and we kissed passionately while exploring each other’s bodies with our hands. And then after a bit, we pulled back and chatted some more. Not every sexual expression has to lead to fucking and cumming. Sometimes, the journey is just as nice, and feeling no pressure to arrive at any certain destination can be a really beautiful experience in and of itself.
We are alive and we love to have full awareness of that. This is how we feed our souls and our relationship, and it’s also how we deal with the pressures of living in such a dark and chaotic world. We cultivate life-affirming energy whenever and wherever we can!
© Copyright Elle Beau 2020 Elle Beau writes on Medium about sex, life, relationships, society, anthropology, spirituality, and love. If this story is appearing anywhere other than Medium.com, it appears without my consent and has been stolen.
