Live Like the Dog Collar Fell off

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” Helen Keller

We adopted our first family dog in 2008 from a local rescue shelter. We had no idea what we were doing. At the time, my five children were aged 16 and under. It was a chaotic household, and the dog seemed to fit right in with the craziness.

I took him to puppy class. The instructor called him “untrainable”. Our pup was hyper and bossy. But he was also affectionate and funny and never bit anyone. We fell in love with him. Yet to curtail his high energy needs, we walked him morning to night. That dog had at least six daily walks between my five children and myself. We didn’t know what else to do with his energy. Thank goodness, everyone loved to take the pup on walks. We lived in a rural area, and there wasn’t much to do.

I did try a private trainer that came to the house. She suggested a chain collar for his pulling. I realize that today, this is considered controversial. We never used it to discipline; it was only put on for walks. Regardless, we must have been doing something wrong with the collar because at least once every few weeks or so, it fell off while one of us was walking him.

The experience of watching my dog’s body language when that collar fell off was both maddening and hysterical at the same time.

Quick disclaimer for those of you who worry that there was a risk of my dog being hit by a car. As I wrote above, we lived in a rural area and on a street where cars rarely drove by.

When it happened to me, I’d hear the jingle of the chain while it fell to the ground. I’d scream in dismay as he took off by running large circles around me. I swear I could hear him laughing at me as he dodged closer, only to veer away in a split second. He never ran away. Instead, it all became a game of “Ha ha, you can’t catch me.” The only solution was to start to walk towards home, knowing he’d follow because you would eventually go inside and lure him towards you with a treat.

What always stayed with me was watching the pure ecstatic joy that his body exhibited when his collar fell off. I assume he felt let loose with complete unrestrained freedom. He displayed spontaneous wild behavior, yet he stayed safely within my eyesight. I know this will sound cliche, but it was as if he ran with the wind. I felt the whoosh of air when he circled me.

Yes, I was always nervous that he’d run away or angry that it happened again. Because every time, we tightened those damn chains. But when I think of the memory, I can’t help but become almost impressed at his triumph into euphoric glee.

It made me wonder. I want to experience that same unadulterated exhilaration. Is it possible?

Last February, I was presented with an opportunity. A witch retreat! I had a lot of faith in the leader that was organizing it. She told me of her goals for the weekend. A group of like-minded women that left their egos at the door. Workshops would be scheduled during the day, and group rituals at night. Laughter, community, empowerment, and magic. It would be my first time doing something just for myself in years. I had to go.

However, I was on a strict budget, and travel expenses were still out of my reach. But I had almost a year to save. The cost was divided into four quarterly payments. I jumped without looking back.

I knew it was in the cards when extra funds started dropping in when a payment was due for my trip. I was able to work extra school clubs for a stipend. The bank sent me a check for credit on my escrow. Before I knew it, it was December first, and my trip had been paid off.

It turned out to be the retreat of my dreams. The other women there were friendly, nonjudgmental, and supportive. Considering we were in close quarters, I was surprised at how much I enjoyed the company of people I just met. The mansion, in an undisclosed location, was private and serene. The workshops were on topics that were of immense interest to me. But it was the rituals at night where I felt like a kid at recess.

A group of women, all dressed in black with long flowing robes and holding hands around the bonfire. We chanted and danced. We laughed and shouted our intentions to the moon. I had never felt more safe…or more alive.

For a brief three days, I lived like the dog collar fell off. There are no responsibilities except fun, excitement, and adventure. It is amazing what could happen when you remove the chains around your neck.

…I highly recommend it.

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