Life as a Series of Next Steps
Reflections of a wiser 40-something
For years I lived my life as a series of next steps, rarely pausing to examine if and what I really wanted.
In my twenties and thirties, these next steps were always seemingly neatly prescribed: go to college, get a job, go to graduate school, get married, have kids, and so on. I did all that, and then some: I have two graduate degrees, several careers, two marriages, two divorces, and two kids. I never questioned any of it, for like a good girl I was simply taking the next step.
There were others who did life differently, however; who backpacked through Europe, did gap years abroad, or worked at Club Med in some remote Caribbean island enriching their world view and probably drinking too much tequila. While I openly criticized their lack of focus, ambition, and responsibility I quietly envied them as I continued to live a more predictable life held back by fear, self-limiting beliefs, and society’s whispers of next steps.
It wasn’t until well past my second divorce that I took the reins of my life back.
Today I live a life in which my only next steps are those that I choose to take towards having the life I love.
Today I focus on my needs, hopes, and dreams versus giving a damn about societal expectations. Today I pause and I ask again and again: what do I really want for myself and my life? Today I know that there is no one right way, but rather what is right for me today, right now. Today I am strong, empowered, independent, and fearless. Today I adventure through life and embrace the here and now.
Today I no longer live my life as a series of next steps laid out by others, but rather I forge my own path and live into my own preferred future.
Today I choose me.
