Letters from Anon
Letters From Anon: Open Letter to Myself When I Want to Quit
Read When You Want To Give Up.
Dear self,
How are you doing, really?
I know you feel like giving up right now, for whatever reason that may be. But, I am here to give you one hell of a pep talk and tell you every reason why you cannot ever give up, not now, not ever.
I love you, and I'm sorry for not telling you this enough.
You are incredible, do you know that? Do you see all of the insane things you have accomplished, as well as how fast? You ran a full marathon at age 14, got a manager's cosmetology license, completed the schooling, and completed the required 2700 working in-salon hours to obtain your license that you have held for almost seven years now! You've completed four terms of two psychology degrees in seven months; survived a life-threatening pregnancy while in two psychiatric facilities in six weeks while having a high-risk pregnancy; you survived an abortion for said pregnancy, as per medical recommendation. You also self-taught your way into having a Social Media Management career while modeling yourself; you achieved your dream of getting into Suicide Girls, too!
Now, you're making a career as a writer and author for yourself and writing a fucking novel to boot! I am so proud of you for all of these things. I genuinely wish you could see how far you have come, especially from your over a decade-long run with active addiction, and now are almost six years sober, and you are not even 25 years old!
You don't, I know. But, you need to! Your entire life is full of trauma and pain, yes. But, it's also filled with remarkable accomplishments! Despite having just summarized all of the things you have accomplished, I will dive into the details of each of them to ensure you stay motivated. You WILL finish this novel, and it will be loved by many, do not think otherwise. In the meantime, when you feel stuck, please read this letter. Please read all of the reasons why you are strong, dedicated, and worth it all.
Let's date this back to when you were 14. You ran 26.2 miles back then! Even if you cannot run now because of it, you still fucking did it. Do you remember, around mile 16, how badly you wanted to give up because it was snowing? After all, you were unsure what you had gotten yourself into. You powered through anyway!
That is what matters!
That was only the beginning too. You also have officially become a fucking Suicide Girls Hopeful Model! This is your life's dream, remember? Do not let impostor syndrome ruin this dream for you. You begged for this dream to come true, so why give up now after all of the work you have put in?
You now are writing your first novel, too! I am so proud of you for this, and remember, it is never a race; it is about the journey of it all. The journey is never about the destination. This is so important to remember. I cannot wait to see what you create; as a matter of fact, if memory serves… just last night, you were screaming with excitement because you created your very first novel draft/synopsis, right?
I know you can do this, you aren't even 25, and you have accomplished and set up three whole careers for yourself. This is huge! You have been to college three times for three different majors. You are the definition of successful, one hundred percent. I hope you can read this when you feel like giving up and that you cannot do this anymore. Or maybe your mental health is getting you down, that is okay!
Nobody is perfect, and nobody is normal. Those things do not exist. Also, please remember…
Time does not exist. It is just a concept; Thus, there is no such thing as a "waste of time." This is so important to remember! Again, also remember that you have support all around you and that you are LOVED. So, please read this short form letter when you feel like life is getting you down, and you feel like giving up.
Giving up is never an option.
Love yourself, always. You are the priority, no one, and nothing else.
Love,
Yourself.
Amethyst Knoxxx is an INFJ, Author in Progress as a part of NaNoWriMo 2021, Freelance Creative Writer, NSFW Blogger, and SuicideGirls Hopeful who writes about all things Sex, Mental Illness, Abusive Relationships, Addiction, Recovery, and THC.
