Legacy Of Love: Torn Apart
Can You Hear Me Now? Rimas Dissolutas
We were separated by work circumstances long before an unnatural disaster struck. The only thing about us foolishly thinking we were” in love” was that it was actually a hardship in disguise. We were living our lives in free verse.
I guess writing a poem about what we lost and what we gained back in the day makes sense that it too started in “free verse.”
Youth Couldn’t Tame Us Or Contain Us (Version 1 — Free Verse)
If not for that seemingly forsaken job site hell We never would have met And I would not be able to yell Across the uncharted miles that I love you I left first. Can you hear me now? With all that I still soulfully am, Eternally.
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
And because that path was fatefully historically ruled true We both were learning to be perpetually calm For that time moment in unuttered misguided hell Will hide from history books, once centuries past will be soon gone And in the rewriting as history books tell — what will be left . . . ?
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
For others to remember what is written in our song Come, guardian angel and let us wordlessly sing In intertwining unfailingly secret never to be told harmony The ancient song of two fate separated lovers Who couldn’t have known their love was never really meant to be.
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
We and our children who wept in their new beginning season Our tears and fears had good reasons to endlessly fall And we found sweet self-serving justified reasons To heed or reject our chosen Maker’s call To mournfully embrace sorrow or joy over that We’d both been wrong in our time to dream even to do so.
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us. — Jerilee Wei © 2023
I originally wrote this 4 stanza poem in free verse, without any rules or meter. I like free verse because it allows more freedom to express my thoughts and feelings. I believe it is the most natural and unconstrained way to begin any poem.
As you can see, my lines are short (for me) and choppy. Looking back it probably reveals the emotional state of living in that moment. It also reveals the chaos and disorder of that time period in my life.
My first stanza reveals the pain of forced separation. While painful and difficult, it was also necessary for the greater good that had far reaching consequences if handled wrong for very powerful people.
My second stanza of the poem shows our mutual acceptance of the separation. At the time, the calm was believed to be temporary by both parties.
The third stanza eludes to the unanswered prayers to a guardian angel to rescue us. We were too naive to not understand love might not be enough to survive what was to come later. Separate paths can lead to separate destinations.
My last free verse stanza speaks to new beginnings, the mourning of what was lost as we told ourselves self-justification myths to grow and carry on. The real triumph over all obstacles was found in maturity and admitting to ourselves that not all true love dreams come true.
Rewriting A Poem In Rimus Dissolutas (Dissolved Rhymes)
Some 42 years later, I look at this tattered and worn out old free verse poem and dream of an ancestor troubadour sharing it in Rimus Dissoulutas. Would that even be possible?
Rimas Dissolutas is another old French poem form from the Middle Ages. Each verse contains lines that rhyme with lines from the next verse instead of each other. It’s a subtle rhyme scheme not every reader picks up on.
Here are the 7 basic rules of Rimas Dissolutas:
- It can have any number of stanzas.
- Each stanza can have any number of lines.
- Each stanza does not always rhyme with each other.
- Lines in each stanza rhyme with the same lines in the next stanza.
- One optional rule of Rimas Dissolutas is to include an Envoi to sum up the poem and offer up a reflection or message.
- Common themes of Rimas Dissolutas: Love and loss; nature; philosophy; religion; social issues; and political issues.
- Common rhyme schemes are: A, A, B, B, C, C, D, D or A, B, A, B, C, C, D, D and A, B, C, A, B, C, D, E.
Youth Couldn’t Tame Us Or Contain Us (Version 2 — Rimas Dissolutas)
If not for that forsaken job site hell, Where we first met, And I could yell Across the uncharted miles that I love you, I left first. Can you hear me now?
With all that I still soulfully am, Eternally. We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
Because that path was fatefully historically ruled true, We both were learning to be perpetually calm, For that time moment in unuttered misguided hell Will hide from history books, once centuries past will be soon gone, And in the rewriting as history books tell, What will be left?
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
For others to remember what is written in our song, Come, guardian angel, and let us wordlessly sing In intertwining unfailingly secret never to be told harmony, The ancient song of two fate separated lovers Who couldn’t have known our love was never really meant to be.
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us.
We and our children who wept in their new beginning season, Our tears and fears had good reasons to endlessly fall, And we found sweet self-serving justified reasons To heed or reject our chosen Maker’s call, To mournfully embrace sorrow or joy over that, We’d both been wrong in our time to dream even to do so.
We were the rule breakers. Youth couldn’t tame or contain us. — Jerilee Wei © 2023
The rhyme scheme I chose in this version of my original poem in the Rimas Dissolutas is A, B, A, B, C, C, D, D. I tried to keep it consistent in both rhyme scheme and line length.
While I won’t go into the more complex sentiment of meaning in this one poem — basically its a love poem about two people who were deeply connected in a historical event, but ultimately separated by fate. Beyond that is my reflection on the passage of time and the ways our memories can be rewritten and reshaped.
On a deeper level knowing the historical context (which is omitted), others who were there with us saw the events unfold differently. As always, no one ever agrees on the details of what happened in the past.
The refrain I chose “Youth couldn’t tame or contain us” is a reflection on our youth in an era where wildness and free spirits were the norm. We were ultimately doomed because of our own choices and by forces beyond our control.
“Tears can be a source of strength and resilience, as they allow us to mourn our losses and move on with our lives. Love deeply in the moments of your time and learn from the fallout of things that could not be changed.”— Jerilee Wei © 2023