Learning To Cast Aside the Shame

Tapping into love to dissolve shame

Monday: Where do you keep your shame?

I have been made to feel shame.

What!?

No one can make you feel anything. Don’t give anyone or anything that power over you.

Fine then… let me rephrase, I feel shame.

It clings to my body like a lover threatening to never let go. My shame crawls under the surface of my skin. It is mostly quiet, moving stealthily.

Its existence relies on me holding back, keeping quiet, and not sharing too much. That’s when it can fester in the quiet corridors of my mind. Where it can grow and strategically plan its domination.

Daring to be more vulnerable has cut out a lot of the shame stored in my body.

Accepting my humanness and learning to love myself is helping to dissolve some of the remaining shame.

Shame still rises when I judge myself though, and this is something I am working to change.

Shame still occasionally threatens to keep me confined to small circles, thoughts, dreams, and visions.

When I release myself from the shame and free myself from the chains, I fly.

I feel empowered, liberated, free to be however and whoever I want. Bold enough to ask for what I desire and free enough to realize the heights I can reach.

Shame tells me branching out is a bad idea, that people don’t want to hear about what I have to say. Shame convinces me my reputation is all that matters, and upholding it is of the highest importance.

When I think about shame I think about something as simple as recognizing I am a sexual human being. My sexuality has caused me to feel shame, the fact I can even write about it is huge progress.

Being bi-sexual has been something I have taken a long time to come to terms with. I still struggle to accept my sexuality in many ways.

Some people still deny bisexuality even exists, and feeling the way I do, simply finding both men and women attractive feels wrong sometimes.

It seems so silly and trivial to write down too. There is no need to feel shame for being a sexual human being, most people are. There is also no need to feel shame for being any sexuality, or for being in any way different.

I accept others openly, so need to learn to give myself the same gift.

So why do I feel shame? I think most of my shame stems from not fitting into broader conditioning, the picture of what normal is supposed to look like, and what I should be wanting and doing with my energy and life.

Society has told me I am deviating from the plan. That I am different, unusual, that I don’t fit neatly into certain boxes. People struggle to understand me.

Life has taught me otherwise though. Life has taught me that everyone is extremely different, and that is beautiful. That there is space for everyone in the world, no matter how unconventional, unique, or out of the box they are.

Life has taught me daring to live your truth is a journey worth committing to. That casting aside the shame is loving and worth befriending your demons for.

So I’m trying to work through my shame, I spent a long time punishing myself for things that I needn’t have.

I’m working on healing now, and I don’t want to feel ashamed of the parts of myself that others may find hard to understand, or that I still don’t completely understand about myself.

I’m swapping shame for self-love and acceptance.

The residual shame is something I am working on dissolving and resolving.

I don’t want to hold myself back or criticize the way I am anymore. I don’t want to spend my efforts and time proving to myself and others that I am worthy of love or acceptance.

I feel worthwhile and love for myself most days now, and each little step forward is shifting my reality.

Recently I have been conserving my energy and have found myself able to enter states of bliss.

I noticed fear and shame appearing as a response to my senses being heightened and becoming more sensitive, more attuned to love. I’ve had to work hard to try and let go of the fear and shame.

To realize it was more of habitual response to blocking the feelings of love and joy rather than a sign of something being wrong.

Perhaps my shame about being in bliss becomes more intense when I can’t share or give it to others too. But that is also what I am working on allowing, feeling love, and receiving it- not having to give it away right away, or at all if I don’t want to.

Feeling shame is not something I want for myself, so I am learning to cast it aside.

Some days when I tap into my senses, the universal energy enables me to enter states of ecstatic pleasure.

The time feels right to embrace these feelings of love, bliss and happiness as much as possible.

To step out of my own way completely and to show shame the door.

I’m tapping into love to dissolve the shame.

Thank you Diana C. for these deeply engaging and inspiring prompts ❤