DOGS DIGGING HOLES FOR FUN AND PROFIT
Landscaping by Dogs
Naughty dogs in the yard take digging to a hole new level
There were so many unintended consequences attached to bringing home Mojo the dog it’s hard to know where to begin. But as we were coming upon his second birthday I think it’s safe to say it’s all water under the bridge.
I’m not sure we understood the premium reserve of unbridled energy this pup was capable of unleashing. I know we were clueless about how resolute his herding instinct would be. But most of all, I don’t think we ever imagined in our wildest dreams how destructive — yet oddly creative — this dude was going to be to our defenseless back yard.
Hosta La Vista, baby!
Within days of his homecoming Mojo was at war with my husband’s Wide Brim hosta plants. In no time they were trampled, chewed, and pulled out by the roots.
By no means delicate or exotic, these hearty members of the lily family at one time lined our fence and graced the perimeter of the oak, pine and Japanese maple trees. The plants are easy to maintain—but they were no match for a dog who behaved as if he were an alien creature sent to earth with the singular mission to annihilate them.
In addition to the hostas, our beds of monkey grass looked like doggy mosh pits, and every single potted plant was reduced to stubs and shards.
Holes, holes, and more holes
And then there were the holes. Lots of them. Big, little, square-shaped, deep, round, shallow, everywhere……all over the yard. So many holes we had to be careful not to trip into one of them making our way from the back door to the workshop.
One morning I went outside and thought someone had dug a grave. “Yeah, they probably dug it for whichever one of us first breaks our fool neck out here,” said Michael wryly. Trenches and craters now dotted a yard where budding bushes and festive flowers used to grow.
I must mention Mojo had help in his excavation work. Although I’m confident he could have cranked out all the holes by himself, he was joined by Mooch, an ancient, black cantankerous hound who simply showed up one morning in our back yard without the slightest intention of leaving.
So, what we’ve got is a pair of imaginative landscapers who get up each morning with one exclusive purpose in their doggy-minds. Landscaping. With the arrival of Mooch, the hole-digging business was elevated to a hole new level. Mooch may be geriatric but he’s like that retired construction worker who never really left the trade. He still pays his union dues and shows up to school the youngins on how it’s done.
Mooch is the one who introduced Moe to the craft of lawn design work. He decided they should move the large decorative rocks which used to surround a ceramic waterfall by the window, and place them at different locations around the yard.
Mooch was not happy with the trellis the rosebushes used to grow on so they simply chewed the wooden pieces to bits and deposited them behind the workshop. Unfortunately they don’t like water hoses either. I’ve lost track of how many of those we’ve had to replace.
Our dogs started their own business
Cesar Millan, the dog whispering trainer-turned-reality-TV-star, argues that dogs need a job; that they’re much happier doing something productive, something physical — not just lazing around on their asses all day long.
I’m not sure that’s true for all dogs. But we know our two fellas have got a side-hustle going on. We suspect they’ve started their own business, probably named Landscaping by Dogs.
Although we’ve offered, so far none of our neighbors in the cove have taken us up on letting them do some freelance work in their yards.
I can’t image why.
Like reading my stuff? If so, use my referral link for unlimited access. Maybe you’d like to write on Medium yourself. Your $5 monthly membership fee supports me and all Medium writers. https://medium.com/@deborah.camp/membership
OR
You’re already on Medium? Just follow me at: https://[email protected]. I write true stories on a range of interesting, sometimes quirky, but hopefully entertaining topics!