Poor Charlie…
King Charles Rushed To Hospital With Severe Case of Bad Karma
Ascending the throne in 2022 after a 75-year wait, the reigning monarch expressed dismay over “my fucking, awful bad luck”
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King Charles was hurried to the hospital on Tuesday with what doctors are calling “one of the worst cases of bad karma we’ve ever encountered.” The British tabloids are calling it a “ROTTEN ROYAL RIP OFF!”
The monarch was just installed to the throne in September 2022 after twiddling-his-thumbs, waiting, tapping his foot, waiting some more, killing time, and standing by for seven decades while his stubborn mother, Queen Elizabeth, refused to abdicate or die.
“With malignant bad luck like this spreading throughout his body, we have to be very careful in the way we treat His Majesty,” said Dr. James Crawford of King Edward Hospital in Marylebone. “We will likely burn sage to smudge the harmful karma from the King’s aura and bring in some Druids to chant healing incantations. That’s about all we can do for him at this point.”
Queen Camilla, wife of King Charles, is also known to brew a potent newt’s eye soup that all of Britain is hoping will quickly change their monarch’s lousy luck.
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