Kill Zombie Kill
The undead creature that waits for me in the darkness.
Tuesday prompt: What keeps you up at night? Describe a creature that embodies those thoughts.
When the sun goes down so does my energy, my inner light and hope. This ghastly beast has been following me in my life for so long and just don’t seem I can escape it. At around 9:30 pm or 10 pm it crawls out of it’s abysmal pit to torment me again. It’s frightening but what’s even more frightening is when I don’t fear it anymore. What If I become numb and I no longer run?
So many days I slept and inside I went Inside I cry this is worse than death. I remember that time I took the unknown into my lungs and I swear I went to the other side. I felt like an angel with dusty wings. I remember how it felt like I was walking in place going nowhere. Trapped in time but I just became a prisoner in my own mind. Why am I here?
Why can’t break free of this monster’s bondage? Sometimes I don’t see it but it’s always there waiting for me. This can’t be life. This can’t be living. I am a decaying corpse on a hamster wheel of hell. Year after year this grotesque figure don’t seem like it wants to go away it wants to stay so why do I stay living with this fear? When will be brave enough to take out my sword and chop it’s head off?
Ephesians 6:17
I’m beyond tired. I’m frustrated. I’m getting angry. You see I wasn’t always that way because there was a time that I welcomed that demon into my space. Was oblivious of it’s ugly and terrifying face. I became self aware it had me in prison. I just want to be free. I want to kill the zombie.
The zombie is within The zombie is me.
This is about working years of night shift at that I didn’t necessarily hate (yes I did) but I became a comfortable sloth working year after year. When my dreams and imagination came alive inside I became restless and uncomfortable because I was finally self aware of what I would turn into every day when the sun went down. Possessed by a mindless routine.
It doesn’t have the power to stalk and hunt me anymore. Now I am the hunter. I’m a warrior ready to take my power back.
Light will overtake the void and I will be reborn into a brand new morning.
Thank you Diana C.
Music by Walter P.o.p. Matthews IV of Cue the score