Writing

13 Clues You’re Maturing as a Writer

Maybe eventually you’ll get a good night’s sleep

I know what you’re thinking …

“I’m already mature, very mature. I’ve been writing for years and know my way around a story. Besides, writing is in my blood — I live and breathe by the words I write. In fact, I can eat, type, answer text messages, and edit my work all at the same time. I’ve got skills!”

Kudos on the multi-tasking abilities and high level of confidence

While admirable in their own right, that’s not exactly what I’m talking about. Because it takes more than a positive self-image and finely-honed juggling act to be a mature person. Especially when it comes to writing — an arena many enter with high hopes and dreams of success — without considering how few will actually survive unscathed by the experience.

“The best time to plan a book is while you’re doing the dishes.” ~ Agatha Christie

Personally, I’m still in the formative stages

Occasionally, I’ve been taken down a peg or two in my naïve wanderings of the literary world after encountering those with advice to offer and lessons to teach. In spite of the blow to my self-worth, I’m continuing along the road to maturing as a writer — and keeping my eyes open for a few friends along the way.

In an article by speaker and success coach, Brian Tracy, he writes:

“Do not worry about what others will think of your writing or your book. What matters is that you get your message out.”

I’m optimistic in my endeavors, knowing someday — if I’m lucky enough and can keep my overly-sensitive feelings from holding me back — I may ultimately attain immunity from my delicate ego. Until that time, I’m taking note of a few signs — changes in attitude — that may suggest I’m on the right track toward such a lofty goal. Maybe you’ll recognize some of these hints in your own approach to writing:

1. You admire and applaud the work of other writers

No longer envious, resentful, or suspicious of other writers and their success, you find yourself connecting with their stories — and offering support and encouraging feedback. The dirge of judgments have been cast aside, dispelled by the reality there’s possibility for improving yourself through the contribution of others. And you’re eager to learn.

2. You no longer need — or want — to be a copycat

Enjoying the work of others is a positive step toward an open and accepting mindset. And while you may agree with the thoughts and ideas of another writer — even to the point of considering mirroring their concepts — be mindful to express your viewpoint from personal experience. Write from your own heart rather than copy-and-pasting another’s, and notice how fresh and genuine your perspective feels.

3. You’re less critical of your work

It’s a pitfall of the craft: We’re our own worst beta readers. And sometimes we forget our attempts at sending a message through our stories is really about making the effort to touch a reader’s mind and influence their lives — to elicit curiosity in a way that resonates with them. When you’re willing to take your judge-y hat off and release your work to thirsty readers — without hesitation — you’ve reached the tipping point of being who you really are, rather than trying to be who you think others want you to be.

4. You find it easier to express exactly what you’re thinking — in your own words

Some writers use the ideas of others word-for-word as reference points or to interject meaning into a piece. Granted, this technique has its place when attempting to explain our direction or the impact of what we want to convey.

Here’s the hard part: While someone else’s words meant something to you, the hard work is in writing about how those words made you feel, what thoughts and desires they stirred, what inspiration and motivation they sparked, and how you’ll integrate those concepts into your life. Give your stories a unique flavor and color by creating a piece developed from the internal thoughts deep inside your brain. And give yourself credit for having the courage to spill your guts.

5. You understand the meaning of patience when it comes to submitting your work

I get it — we’re all anxious for exposure and feedback. We need approval, acknowledgment, and acceptance. And we want it right now! But we’ve recognized the advantages of becoming mature people and learned that a knee-jerk click can have consequences.

So now we pause before submitting to allow for the benefit of reviewing and re-editing our work. We sleep on it for a day or two, and then put fresh eyes on our story. And when we finally release that breath we’ve been holding in — and our doubts have left the building — we send our article on its way with good intentions and crossed fingers.

6. You welcome criticism with an open mind

They’re everywhere — critics who render unsolicited opinions, less-than-friendly attitudes, and occasional verbal abuse of your articles. There’s no getting around it, unless you decide to give up on writing.

Here’s my take when negative missiles are launched my way: Others have a right to speak their mind, and it has nothing to do with me. In the same way those commenters could have chosen not to read the article, my position is that a response isn’t necessary from me. My participation in easing the displeasure expressed in a negative comment isn’t mandatory.

The good news? The final word rests with me. Because I can decide whether there’s any validity in a comment, or I can pass it off as a side-effect of the profession.

7. You understand not everyone will connect with your writing — and that’s okay

It’s important to figure out early on that what you’re conveying in your articles won’t appeal to everyone. And if you’re being honest in your efforts, you already understand not everyone is supposed to get it. The satisfaction comes from reaching those who do understand and appreciate your work — and will continue to support your creativity.

8. You’ve developed a sense of what comes naturally, and which topics are best left alone

Trying to be a one-person circus act can drain the life from both you and your stories. Generic articles written to an already overwhelmed audience seeking originality rarely gain any notoriety — or momentum. Because there’s a lot of pablum out there — articles barely scratching the surface of an idea without digging into the dark crevices of truth.

Instead, write about the subjects that matter to you rather than trying out unfamiliar digs, hoping to be noticed by accident. Your focus should be direct and distinct — and stay in line with your view of life. Readers will sniff out a misdirect quicker than a banana in the noon sun.

9. You’ve come to grips with not being as brilliant and engaging as you thought you were

We believed our parents, siblings, friends, and co-workers when they clapped and cheered us on with our writing efforts. So we fueled our own fire, continuing to send them our links, ebooks, and newsletters — fishing for more of the same — until the adoring feedback fizzled out, or someone eventually offered an honest opinion you weren’t anticipating. And then your inflated confidence dissipated, and you began to question everything you’ve ever written.

Now what? Get over it. Yes, some of your work will capture the minds and souls of hundreds, maybe even thousands. And some of your pieces will fall on fallow fields. In the end, you’ll discover your personal direction and stick with it. Because there’s just too much waiting to be written to allow the barbs of dissenting opinion to leave more than a benign scratch on your authenticity.

10. You’ve learned the importance of taking breaks from writing

Oh, the inner mind of a writer. Most of the time, it’s a chaotic, stressful place. And the thought of emptying our mental inventory of thoughts and ideas for even a short period of time can cause panic and turmoil — and produce high levels of separation anxiety.

Yet the building pressure of constantly churning out words, getting every thought down in some form or fashion, and not allowing a single idea to escape into the mist doesn’t always bring our best work to the forefront. Remember this: Even a hurricane has a center — a calm eye — allowing for a respite from the storm. Mentally stepping aside and laying your writing triggers to rest may be the best habit you can establish to keep your imagination alive and producing great work.

11. The pursuit of your craft is a joy rather than a job

Here’s the trap with most activities that start as pleasurable past-times: We find things we like to do and call them hobbies. This carefree nomenclature sets us up with a relaxed, positive mindset — because we believe we can have a simple, fun experience or produce a creative work of art without obligation, responsibility, or concern about the outcome. This free-form mindset is rejuvenating, with nary a thought or worry about how you spent the time.

But ultimately, for some, that “hobby” becomes a profession, a career — a business. And that’s when the scales tip from happy-go-lucky enjoyment of a fulfilling activity to a structured mindset geared toward achievement, accomplishment, and success.

Is it possible to have both? Let me know how you do with this one, because I’m still struggling with the balance between work and play — and I’m always looking for a few good methods to help resolve my inner conflict.

12. When your inner voice speaks to you, you listen rather than argue

Admit it: You’re talking to yourself all the time — even right now while you’re reading this article. Your inner voice is speaking the words, while also discussing the merits and pitfalls in a tandem conversation. Granted, it’s hard to ignore or avoid our internal questions and judgments — even when they’re wrong.

And that’s the clue — the doubt that rises from within you attempting to grab your attention in the form of a challenging discourse. But rather than jumping in with both feet or flicking it off like a stinging bug, you’ve learned the importance of silencing the dissenting intruder until you’ve had time to think things through.

13. You’ve realized your stories are your children

If you’re a writer, your family is always growing — creating offshoots of ingenuity and discovery. With each piece, you learn something new — something you can bring to the next, and the next, and the next. And just like children, you’ll discover the unexpected, the barrage of questions, and the deep connection you develop with each one. Some will be good, some will be bad, and some will be great. And you love them all equally.

Personally, I’m looking forward to adulthood.

Maybe then I’ll eventually get a good night’s sleep — if I can get over the nagging feeling there’s still lots of work to be done.

“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood. I’d type a little faster.” ~ Isaac Asimov

© 2021 Jill Reid. All Rights Reserved.

Jill Reid is the author of Real Life and Discover Your Personal Truth.

Jill Reid is the author of Please God, Make Me A Writer and the Real Life Series, including Real Life and Discover Your Personal Truth. Her books and articles explore life, happiness, relationships, health, and personal success strategies.