Jealousy Is The Cancer Of The Soul

There is perhaps something that I follow by in life, a quote perhaps thoroughly tested and understood by a myriad of experiences. It is by a well earned honorable man named Ali Ibn Abi Talib, one whose feats speak for themselves.

“He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere.”

I have perhaps been the first part, and know it all too well. I have had thousands of friends and been a brother to all of them. My treatment and caring gestures were perhaps equal to all. Yet I witnessed jealousy among them towards each other and a sense of hatred that stemmed from the jealousy.

They perhaps even envied the other when they were hanging with me. It was perhaps 6 years ago, my friend had recently visited me after a long time so we decided to celebrate over at Pizza Hut. My friend has a habit of check-in through social media apps — you get the gist.

After a few minutes, I got a message from another friend with a very vague and discontentful sentiment, saying “You are hanging out with him, and didn’t even invite me.” He further elaborated, by saying “You don’t hang out with us, but you’re hanging out with him.”

Perhaps this was a lie all too preposterous. The key factor was he couldn’t fathom the sentiment, my friend posted of “enjoying the life” which is I believe a bad thing to do.

Overall, I told him that I give everybody my time and take care of everyone. He should analyze himself first so that he knows what he is talking about. Soon after, I talked to my friend whom I was out with over this issue. He said, “okay Abi(brother)” — I won’t do check-ins when we are out.

He understood the inconvenience of people stemming from such a jealous sentiment. This was perhaps prevalent in all the friendships I had during that time.

If you have a thousand friends, I believe none of them would be true to you and neither one would feel empathy towards you, they perhaps might be a means to an end and using you for the present. In most scenarios, your actual friend’s people who will long for you, and will miss you when you’re gone are the ones who you will be casual with and not the ones you’d be surrounded with all day.

Meet the people in such a manner that if you die, they should weep for you, and if you live, they should long for you. — Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib

People with the diseases of the soul, and the self who couldn’t bear each other and would put up a facade to like one another. There were perhaps, two people in my company once I invited to my apartment, back in my college days. Both were not on speaking terms with one another. When I put two people in a room, one went outside to walk in the street and the other went to the roof.

They couldn’t even stand each other, fun fact: they were the besties when I met them. But somehow, when I got close to the other both exhibited this sentiment of “my friend, or mine.”

There is perhaps another quote by Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib that I have known all too well,

Don’t develop a friendship with the enemy of your friend; otherwise, your friend will turn into an enemy.

This perhaps I experienced in their circumstance. One became an enemy and would conspire to break my friendship with the other, though how futile efforts. But I did understand the sentiments of envy and jealousy — resentment that started it all. I was more careful to read people and the “how” they react in front of others. This becomes easier when you interact with thousands of people.

Jealousy is perhaps deeply rooted in people due to the culture these days, and so is envy. This is pushed by the ideals most people pursue, and it eats them from within. Faulty ideas, and lofty sentiments towards one another, using the other for a means to an end and so much more. There is no one cause to this issue of jealousy.

Some are raised in an environment where they are fundamentally taught to despise others who have enough or more than what they have. They are never taught to relish gratefulness nor do they teach themselves. Positive people are probably more prone to experience negativity. Being positive is like a double-edged sword in the world of today.

It hurts, but you learn to manage it.

It builds tolerance when you try to make it work with what you have. At the end of the day, jealousy can stem from one’s ignorance towards their self worth of themselves. They might not even accept certain factors that contribute towards their behavior and would use that to blame other people for their misfortunes.

They would neither try to make things work nor would they behave. As a child, sit in a corner and would waste the efforts of people trying to bring them together to look past certain setbacks.

You can learn perhaps many things about a jealous man, one thing pretty much certain about them is that neither they ask forgiveness nor do they forgive. They put themselves on a higher pedestal than the rest of the people around them.

It is perhaps sometimes best said, that these people should be left to their own devices because they tend to blame others who help them as well and cause them mental and in some cases physical harm as well.

Jealousy is cancerous — it spreads to everyone around you, it can influence a sentiment that can destroy your will. It not only causes one to lose friends but also loses themselves in the process. They become a shattered person by harboring such sentiments towards themselves and other people. It is much hard for them to move on in life.

They neither put their trust in others nor do they believe in others. Life becomes a fallacy, and they blame it on others and never themselves. They do not look to their faults, and never improve on them. Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib better said this, for these people as

The most ignorant of those who are ignorant is the one who trips over the same stone twice.

It blinds them to the truth and their actions. Their soul becomes corrupted with vices and evils that make them a prisoner of these evils. It is much harder for them to see themselves in the mirror. They do not even understand what they have been given with.

They don’t practice humility. Instead, they insult others for what they have as they despise them and what they have.

A Jealous person can be a toxic influence on other people as well. This disease passes from a person to another. It is perhaps even more harmful than a virus. It remains in all hearts and becomes active when someone possesses insecurity towards someone or something.

Therefore, we need to be aware of such things. Practice to accept what we have, and try to become aware of our actions and reactions. We should think before we speak. We should always try to understand others and be grateful for what we have and bless others for having theirs and not spite them for it.

As, Wakefulness is consciousness. — Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib

Being thankful and showing gratitude is perhaps the best deed one can do for one’s self and mankind maintaining the soul’s integrity and health.