January Chat #1
I Just Needed Some Company
I make no apologies for being old. It happens. It sneaks up on you. There is still a part of me that is six years old. Another part is in the mid-twenties. There’s another part near my right calf that might be edging closer to 34. It is just not an even advancing of age.
I’m not complaining, it’s just an observation. It’s nice to be retired because now I’ve got time to think about such things.
I was wondering what to write about earlier in the day and I threw the page open for my spirit guide Seth to say something inspiring or educational. Instead, my mother showed up. She suggested I get a haircut. Thanks Mom. You’re welcome, Sweetie.
See, I talk to invisible folk (literary characters) and to dead people. My mother being one of the aforementioned dead people. I lost it in the middle of our discussion of my hair because grief just never goes away no matter how long it’s been. You get used to it. It might be years before you stop resisting the urge to call her. But grief never really goes away. People will tell you that it does. What does happen is that it gets sort of manageable.
It was nice to hear from her even though she’s been dead since 1994.
She is fine, by the way. Everybody who dies is fine. We might miss them to pieces, but the question of do they want anything? Is there something we can do for them? Are they at peace? That’s a big No, no and yes. They can also see you still. I remember asking why my mother could be with all five of us kids at the same time when we are spread out all over the United States. She just said she could. That solved the question I had of logistics for the dead.
I feel like I might get a cup of tea and enjoy the rest of this chat with you.
What are you going to do in January? Do you have any big or new plans or is it back to the same old grind? For many years there were times when I didn’t even take the holiday. That was when I worked for an accountant. She didn’t take time off. Consequently, neither did I. You might think of it as strange, but it gave me some insight into what it turned out to be like as a writer.
I have no set time to write. It’s 2:20 in the afternoon right now and I’m finally sitting down to write something other than the chat I had with my mother this morning about my hair. I wonder if it might be productive to have a topic jar at hand. Like a job jar, but instead of things to do there might be topics. Not one-off stories but something that might be stretched out for a while. I’m going to go get that tea. Be right back.
Okay, I’m back. For the Topic Jar. Our health. Anything about it. Start with the stuff that bugs you the most. Read up on it. Go to Reddit and see what they are talking about. As we get older more and more things are just not the same as when you were in your prime. Like now sometimes when I walk down the hallway with each step comes a puff of air. It’s not coming out of my shoes. Why does that happen? Is this when the need for charcoal lined underwear comes up?
What else? Hobbies. What sort of things do you like to do? They don’t have to earn money to be fun to do. Like writing. It’s my hobby. I earn a tiny little bit with it, but not enough to pay the rent which, ideally, I should think would be the goal. Bigger goals after we do that. Hobbies can be carving. You could take pictures of what you are carving. I’ve been fascinated to learn carving. I’m okay with crochet hooks, but to face a block of wood and see a gnome inside, well, I don’t know how to do that. If you know how that would be worth a series of great articles. Get 15 of them together and write a book. I’d buy a copy.
Eating. Everybody eats. Talk about some of your favorite dishes. Take recipes your grandmother or great grandmother used to make. Put your twist on them. Illustrate them with a photo you snap from your own phone.
Mundane things. Chores around the house. I would talk about my three Thing Rule. If I find myself putting something away, I have to do two more things. It helps to keep the clutter down. It’s a system of sorts. It works for me.
Talk about animals. Talk about your pets. Not everybody has animals, and they might like to hear you talk about yours. Like just now as I was pouring the hot water for my tea there was a big kerfuffle that happened out on the patio. Molly’s tail had exploded to twice its normal size. She, Millie and Stanley were all shocked and confused running in circles out on the patio. Somebody had come up the stairs. They were also taking turns smelling the rug covered ottoman by the front door. There is a cat bed underneath for anybody who wants to take a snooze in private.
I didn’t see whoever it was, but I have a feeling it might have been Sunny. Sunny is a fluffy yellow cat who has lived in the neighborhood the last five years or so. Originally, he had a collar on with his name tag and a telephone number. At the time he was acting like a stray cat and had begun to befriend us. But, then the Evanosky cat corp collected together in a united front and drove him off. Why I think it might be him is my husband regularly feeds him out where we park our car. Sunny is friendly and they have nice man to cat conversations. I saw Sunny up on the patio recently having a drink of water. After our little Daisy Mae passed away last month, I said to Dennis I wanted another kitty. Then, I said, lets give Sunny a few months. He might want to join the family. So, that might be happening. The strays move in when they are done with street life and want to retire. It’s cold out and it’s been raining. He just might want some shelter.
You could talk about things you are learning. I am a great proponent of always having something going on in my life. I’ve been learning languages for many years. I don’t really have anybody to talk with, but I’m not worried about that part. Especially Spanish. In our neck of the woods, Northern California there are lots of Spanish speaking folks. But I also count Norwegian, French and German as languages I’d like to learn more of. If you’ve got a vocabulary of 2,000 words you might have a decent conversation with someone. When I took Spanish in the 8th grade my teacher told me she’d never heard anybody speak Spanish with a Norwegian accent which was the first language other than English that I learned.
Okay, time to wrap this up. It was nice talking to you. Tell me what kind of tea you like, and I’ll get some in. Bye.
The Links Reddit — Am I the Asshole? People write in with their situations and ask, AITA? There are some doozies. Usually, these are younger folks with opinionated friends and relatives. You get to tell them to dump their boyfriend and enjoy life.