Jane Austen’s Wastebasket Submission Guidelines

Everything you need to know to get your humor published here

*Note: If you are already a writer for JAW please submit directly through Medium, no need to use the email.

Hello!

After nearly two years I decided to rewrite the Jane Austen Wastebasket Submission guidelines. It needed an overhaul to better aid potential writers and myself. I hope those of you who stumble upon this page after seeing the main blog and thinking, “Wow! I want my stuff there,” find this guide useful.

First and foremost I want to say, welcome. I am excited to read and possibly publish your stories. Before that happens though there are a few things you should know.

Things you should know:

-Your story doesn’t have to be literature or history themed! I love that kind of humor, but I publish almost all kinds of funny stuff as long as it’s satire.

-I need your Medium draft link. Please don’t send me your piece in a pdf. Or in a document. Or pasted to the email. I need the Medium draft link. You’ll find a handy guide for how to send the draft link below if you’re new. Since this blog is on Medium only, I want to make sure that all potential writers are actually on the platform. If you’re not on the platform then welcome to Medium. You would need to sign up before I can read your piece.

-I will take 1–3 days to get back to you if you’re a new writer. I sometimes lose track of emails. So if you don’t hear from me after three days please feel free to send me a message to give me a nudge.

-Calls to action are OK in moderation, I will let you know if it is too much. Please to stick to Medium guidelines though.

-I can’t give specific notes as to why I reject a piece right now. I’m sorry, I’m one person, and it’s quite difficult to give notes to everyone. I do have a handy “How to write humor” series on the site, which will hopefully continue to grow. So please check that out as it might help you get an idea of what I’m looking for.

-I only published unpublished drafts.

-I’m pandemic/covid fatigued. I would recommend sending that specific content somewhere else.

-I am the worst at catching my own mistakes. So I get it. That being said, you get 5 freebie mistakes before I close the document and send you a note asking you to go over your piece for grammar and spelling before resubmitting.

Other things you probably want to know

-The best way to know if your work would be a good fit here? Check out pieces in the blog. Look at the headings of what kind of pieces I publish. “Culture” is meant to be a catchall that encompasses a wide variety of topics as long as they relate to society or culture. In particular, I love to publish satirical/humor pieces about history, books, technology, or relationships.

-I don’t usually make lists. However when it comes to illustrated lists I love them, please send them.

-Comics are great! However, I’m not publishing single-panel comics at this time. Please aim for at least 4 panels if you are thinking of submitting a comic.

-You must state whether you own the images you use or source them so I can check where there came from and if they are public domain.

-NOTE: I don’t publish non-fiction. So I won’t read your personal essays, no matter how funny they are.

-Pieces should be 400–800 (ish) words long (shorter or longer are OK but may not A: fulfill the premise or b: be too wordy). Please stay within those parameters if you are a new writer trying to get something into the publication. I sometimes break that rule, but usually only with writers who have published at least one thing here previously.

How to format your submission

I will be needing you to send me a Medium draft link of your work. And I also need it to be formatted correctly.

First when you are on Medium you will notice a “write” button by your profile pic.

Click that. You’ll end up on this page.

At this point you will copy and paste your work onto this page before you start formatting it. Unless you are one of those strange people who can actually write your story on Medium itself. In which case good for you.

Your story will start to look something like this. If you are confused how I got those formats let me show you. When you highlight a word or area with your mouse you will see “T” which will format the title and subtitle for you if it is not automatically formatted.

Big “T” for the title.

Smaller “T” for the subtitle.

If your piece has headings you will want to format them with the smaller “T” in the piece as well. This will make them bolder and bigger than your other section, making it clearer to read.

Now your piece is almost done. But wait. You need an image.

Space your title down. In the blank area above you will see the “+” sign. Click that.

If you have an image on your computer that is yours you can hit the camera and insert it. Or drag and drop directly. Otherwise if you need to find one, hit the search button which is the magnifying glass.

You will have a space to enter text. Find a keyword to search for. You may not find what you are looking for with one keyword so don’t be afraid to go back and keep looking.

Once you find an image click it. It will appear on your story with the photo credit. This is the quickest way to find photos if you’re new to Medium.

Now I need that draft link so I can read your story.

See that publish button? Don’t hit it. Remember I almost only take unpublished drafts via email. Instead hit those three dots next to the publish button and the bell. A drop down menu will appear.

Click on “Share Draft link” so that you get the link below.

Copy the link and send it me.

Where to send it

Please write an email to [email protected]

Please write JAW Submission in the subject line.

Send me a quick “Hi” and your draft link.

Awesome! You’re done. You’ll hear from me soon.

If I say “NO THANKS”…

It’s nothing against you, humor is subjective. There are probably many reasons I pass. One of them could be… It’s too wordy. It was far too brief. It felt like a first draft. It doesn’t heighten. It needs a stronger premise. You used images you weren’t supposed to. You had way too much sex stuff in there. You cursed too much. I’ve seen a similar premise somewhere else so needed a different take. You didn’t format it correctly. You sent me non-fiction advice, essays, or something else that I obviously don’t publish here. You were deeply offensive for the sake of edginess alone. It’s too on the nose (particularly in the case with politics). It’s written in the Onion format which works for the Onion but I don’t tend to publish that format.

If I said “MAYBE”…

This usually means I enjoyed your piece but only have a few things I’d like to work with you on. This might mean taking apart a section to make it snappier or cutting/adding a section for clarity or heightening. These notes are offered with a grain of salt (,humor is subjective) but if you are not interested in a rewrite at all please let me know when I ask if you’d be interested in notes to get the piece to a publishable place. It’s fine if you don’t want the notes, I promise, but I prefer to save my time for other submissions and your time so you can get to submitting your piece somewhere else.

If I say “YES”…

Congrats! You’ve got an acceptance! Now what?

First I will add you as a writer to Jane Austen’s Wastebasket so you can submit the draft to the publication directly. NOTE: ONCE YOU ARE A WRITER FOR JANE AUSTEN’S WASTEBASKET YOU CAN SUBMIT DRAFTS DIRECTLY ON MEDIUM FOR CONSIDERATION. This means you don’t have to do the above email submission every time.

So once I’ve let you know I want your piece what should you do? This can be confusing for new writers so I’ll explain how you do that step by step.

How to submit your work once I’ve accepted your work and added you as a writer

Remember those three dots? Go and click on those again. Do not click “publish” though. When you hit the three dots the drop down menu will appear again.

This time click “add to publication.” A list of publications you are a writer for will come up.

Click the circle next to Jane Austen’s Wastebasket and “Select and continue.”

You’ll notice the button that once read “publish” now reads “submit.” Click it.

This screen will show up. Over by tags you can pick whatever you like as long as they are relevant. I do go over these as well and change them as I see fit if I don’t feel they work. If you leave a few or all blank don’t worry, I can pick tags for you.

Leave the “meter my story” button checked in green so you get paid.

If everything looks good hit the “submit to publication” button.

There! You’re done. I’ll schedule your story and you’ll be published soon.

I hope this helped! Looking forward to reading your work.