I’ve Gone About Life in 2 Ways. One Is Better.
Your mindset matters
I’ve gone about my life in 2 ways.
One is far better than the other. For me at least.
The bad way
I wake up in the morning and stumble out of bed.
I go through my life on autopilot. I follow a strict routine.
I mindlessly settle into my work. It’s repetitive and boring. There’s no excitement.
I earn a steady paycheck and put it towards my future.
I focus so heavily on the future that I almost miss the fact that I’m barely living in the present.
Yes, I know that my job has its issues. My manager sucks and I don’t feel a sense of belonging on the team. But I can push through it. Besides, not everything is meant to be perfect right?
This way of going about my life hasn’t served me well.
I call this playing not to lose.
You’re going to the poker table with tons of chips and your only goal is to not lose them all.
You avoid taking any risks.
You choose the stable things. You follow the chosen path. You don’t question anything.
You talk about making changes, but you don’t take action. You still hold out some belief that there’s more to life than going through the motions.
It feels like a slog.
The good way
I wake up in the morning feeling energized and excited to do the thing I’m meant to do.
Whether that be rolling around at jiu jitsu, writing, walking out in nature, learning to invest, or something else.
There’s a deep knowing that I’m doing the things I’m supposed to be doing. My life has led me to this point.
It feels like I’m moving closer to my dreams with each passing day.
There are more risks. There’s uncertainty.
But with those risks come excitement and passion.
I call this playing to win.
I feel more engaged, happy, and peaceful in my life when I am playing to win.
I’m putting all of myself into something. Because that’s what’s required of me if I want to succeed.
I know that challenges lie ahead, but I also know that I can face them head-on and learn from each of them.
You take calculated risks that might pay off. You know that you might fail, but you don’t let that consume you.
You keep shooting your shot. You remain optimistic even when you feel afraid.
You continue going through the process of trial and error.
You build momentum. And it feels amazing.
The difference
Playing to win and playing not to lose are two completely different things.
When playing not to lose, you can’t really be creative. You’re in conservation mode. You just want to hold onto the things you’ve earned. It feels like life is passing you by.
I’ve spent a couple years of my life playing not to lose. And I felt miserable.
On the outside, things looked good. I had a great job and was making good money for my age. I had friends and hobbies. I was close with my family.
But it felt hollow. It was as if my deepest self knew that I wasn’t using all of my attributes and skills. This mode of living wasn’t requiring me to give it my all.
Playing to win is the opposite.
When you’re playing to win, you have to put all of yourself into something.
You push forward each and every day.
As a student, it felt like I was playing to win. I was working full-time while earning my master’s on the side. I had to work hard.
I pushed myself to my limits. For those 2 years, I had no social life. I didn’t have time for anything outside of work and school. It was a tough period.
But I would wake up every day feeling like I was making my dreams a reality. And I was. Little by little.
It was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done and it demanded all of me. But I felt far better doing that than I did when I finished.
After graduating, I worked a mellow job where I could coast by and people worked around 30 hours a week. Nobody cared about anything. I no longer felt like I was making my dreams a reality.
I was stagnating and began to feel like a passive observer in my own life.
Now, I’m playing to win.
It feels incredible. I hope to never spend my life playing not to lose again.
Even if I were to retire, I think I’d devote myself to other endeavors that would allow me to play to win.
I hope that these contrasting lifestyles help you reflect on your own life.
✌️ Two easy ways you can help me out:
- Subscribe to my weekly mailing list
- Follow me: simplest