MOM LIFE HUSTLE

I’ve Gained Two More Mouths to Feed

Tamagotchis are back, bitch

In addition to my four kids and two dogs, I now have an additional two mouths to feed.

My mother-in-law gave my kids Easter baskets and what were those fun-looking keychains in my older kids' baskets?

Tamagotchis

Memories of my bunny gigapet I had as a child came rushing in. I was now so excited for my own kids to experience the joy of taking care of their very own digital pet.

That was before the beeping began.

On our car ride home, mass beeping ensued in the back seat.

“Turn that beeping off!” Us parents yelled from the front.

“We can’t!” was the children’s response.

“What do you mean?”

“We don’t know how!”

“Well, then turn the volume down!”

“We can’t!”

After some frantic googling and watching lengthy YouTube videos about Tamagotchis — beeeeep beep beep beep — my husband figured out how to quiet them for bedtime so that they wouldn’t beep at us all night.

They still beep during the day, though.

“Be sure to feed my Tamagotchi!” My kids shout at me as they head out the door for school. “I’ve worked so hard and I don’t want it to die! It might grow legs soon!”

“I can’t, I have too much to do already!” I try to implore to no avail as the closing door cuts me off.

I’m a pushover and my kids know it.

So during the chaos of the day, when my baby is crying and (beep beep beep) my three-year-old repeatedly calls “Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Moooooooommmmmm" there is also frantic beeping in the background.

Beeeeep beep beep beep beeeep beep!

I run around feeding all the mouths. First, fill the dog bowls (for our non-digital pets).

Beeeeep beep beep beep beeeep.

Next, set up the baby in the high chair and prepare to spoon-feed her mush. Then, get the three-year-old’s lunch on the table. Beeeeep beep beep beep beeep beep beep.

Finally, find the frantic beeping. One Tamagotchi on one side of the house, the other one clear on the other side.

I flush their poop, give them medicine, feed them hamburgers and cake, and sometimes for good measure play a “game" with them (beep boop beepity beepy beeeep).

Is it an easy life, being needed all the time? No. But it sure is rewarding to see my kids happy and see their Tamagotchis finally grow legs.

What animals are these hungry lil mouths to constantly feed even supposed to be, anyway?

If this wasn’t enough of my chaos for you, read more here: