Satire | Humor | And that gray area nestled somewhere in between

It’s Time We Erect a Statue for Kyle Rittenhouse

So we have something to tear down in a few years

I’ve been searching through my daily feeds — waiting for the announcement that a statute of Kyle Rittenhouse is about to be funded.

Not kidding. It’s the right time. And America right now — is the right place.

I’m not thinking massive — Statue of Liberty size (Bartholdi would be displeased) but something reasonable.

Something placed in the heart of Kenosha, Wisconsin, because it was the heart of Kenosha that found Mr. Rittenhouse to be innocent of killing two men and seriously wounding a third.

The statue should be crafted with care and not be over the top. We don’t want to lionize Mr. Rittenhouse, no that would be gauche. It should, above all else, put his acts into perspective.

We’ve already heard from the pundits at Fox and other outlets who nearly tripped over one another as they heaped praises on Mr. Rittenhouse.

Declaring that his act of conscience and his innate desire to go out and protect others, even at such a young age, is something that other teenagers in America should aspire to.

So long as they have older friends willing enough to lend a hand.

It seems that when Mr. Rittenhouse received his $1200 pandemic check from Uncle Sam, he like many Americans, who found themselves at the receiving end of America’s largess — went out and bought a gun.

Well, not precisely. Since he was only 17 at the time of the purchase (not just anyone can go out and buy a rifle) he handed the cash over to a friend.

Dominic Black (now 20), did what any good friend would do — he went out and bought a Smith & Wesson AR-style semiautomatic assault rifle for a buddy.

Mr. Rittenhouse, then traveled the 20 odd miles to Kenosha, from his hometown of Antioch, Illinois, with the intention of protecting businesses from the protesters who were out and about and up to no good.

I see nothing unusual in this.

When I was 17 years old, I too had thoughts of carrying a rifle and going out to protect the interests and possessions of fellow Americans. It was called the Vietnam War and getting a gun back then was almost as easy — I only needed to enlist.

But that’s neither here nor there. We are discussing the merits of truly honoring an American who takes protecting other people’s property seriously.

And who understandably felt that carrying a semi-automatic rifle along with others into an area crowded with people who were protesting the earlier shooting of an unarmed man, also in Kenosha — would not in any way stir up additional unwanted emotions.

Why would it?

Thanks to endless press releases and coverage of gun rights lobbyists wringing their hands over the latest shootings, many Americans have become comfortably numb to the loss of life, and to the continuous presence of guns, such that it has become difficult to get a clear view of what is right and what is wrong.

Perhaps Mr. Rittenhouse and other armed participants in the Kenosha protests, thought that by shouting Friendly? Friendly! Friendly! into the crowd of highly agitated citizens, they would somehow create a different reaction.

But returning to the main issue at hand, a statue is one way Americans pay homage to those that risk their lives and, in many cases, give their lives so that others can live in peace and safety.

That these acts of courage and honor normally take place on the battlefield or in moments of extreme peril when America and or Americans are at risk, should not deter the city planners of Kenosha from putting together an action plan to erect a statue in Mr. Rittenhouse’s name.

What message this would send to the rest of America, of course, would be open to some interpretation. After all, not every state, nor city in these United States, believes that carrying a gun into a crowd practicing some form of civil unrest, should be met with deadly force.

He could have purchased a beanbag shotgun that perhaps would have left bruises and not lethal holes on their bodies — but this gun is universally known to be a poor weapon of choice when out in the woods protecting other Americans from deer and rabbits and squirrels who might be endangering property and in some rare cases — human life itself.

But again, neither here nor there. That Mr. Rittenhouse did his duty in defending the hardware stores and Dairy Queens along Main Street Kenosha, is proof enough that there is still red-blooded, blood, flowing through the veins of America today.

The statue thus erected in a place where the citizens of Kenosha can see it while on their way to Kroger’s or Walmart, will remind them that there are those out there who will continue to come to their aid during times of danger and ensure that they have unimpeded access to beer, cheese, and other essentials.

It is interesting to note, that Mr. Black is apparently still facing two felony charges for providing Mr. Rittenhouse with the rifle and yet interestingly enough, the one who wielded the gun and killed two men is free of all charges, while he, may still end up doing time.

Perhaps this too can be noted somewhere on the statue — that America is the land of the free but its legal system is still a work in progress.

And of course, in a few years’ time, when history books portray this incident, perhaps a little too enthusiastically and the sensibilities of the nation once again shift in a whole new direction — the citizens of Kenosha can rally around the city square, where the statue was erected and tear the sucker down as a continuing act of contrition and erect one for the men who died instead.

America can be fickle in that way.

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