It’s okay to quit
How quitting my job made me feel like failing but was the best decision ever.
For a long time now, I was thinking about writing this story but I couldn’t figure out how to start. Last weekend a friend told me about a quote she read and it’s matching perfectly to this story, so here goes:
It’s okay if I make mistakes in life, I’m doing this for the first time.
I couldn’t find the original quote and also I believe it goes better in German than in English, but the point is, it’s okay to make mistakes. That’s exactly what I want to tell you today.
This topic is important to me because I recently quit my job. The job was part of my studies and it would have taken 7 more weeks (after 6 months) to successfully finish this semester.
Quitting 7 weeks before the end, who would do such a thing?
Well, I did.
I wasn’t feeling happy there. I felt like I don’t fit in, don’t belong there. I felt like my skills and also my personality isn't fitting with my colleagues. It should have been a place to learn and improve my skills, instead, I just started to doubt my abilities in general.
It also affected my personal life. In my free time I was thinking about my job, what tasks need to be finished the next day, how much time it’s going to take, which time would be best to leave in the morning. Even after a relaxing weekend I still felt exhausted.
People tend to say you just have to fight it, go through it, change your attitude…
Well, I tried, gave my best and still it didn’t work out.
Admitting that this job is not what I was looking for, was hard. I wanted to give my best, I wanted to learn and succeed, I wanted to fit in, I wanted to do good. But it didn’t work and it made me mad.
I felt like giving up, weak for not trying any longer even when I knew that I can’t take it any more.
I think, deep inside, we always know or feel what’s the best for us. We know if there is something we could change about the situation, even if it’s just our own attitude and if we even have the energy for these changes.
Short input about changing your attitude I’m not a big fan of this idea. I mean, do you really want to change your personality to fit into a position at work? People always say you need to stay just as you are and you shouldn’t change yourself for another person. But a hell lot of people expect that you change to fit into a position at work. Yes, sometimes changes are necessary and they’re not per se something bad but I think we need to be careful with this.
So, back to my story. I knew I’m not feeling happy but I was scared to quit. What would people think? It’s just 7 weeks so just grit your teeth and stop crying! But it seems as my subconscious knew better than my brain and really begged me to stop. I started to feel nauseous every morning and getting headaches almost every evening.
Finally, I did the right thing and quit. Even when at first I really felt like I failed, but when I talked to my family and friends they all reacted the same way: If you feel like you can’t do it any longer, and your body is giving you clear signs, then quit. It’s not weakness you’re showing, it’s strength.
What I want to say with this story is actually this: If your work or your relationship or friendship or hobby or whatever isn’t making you happy, no even worse, is making you tired, unbalanced, sad, frightened, miserable, then you actually show courage in quitting. If you really stand by your decision, no one is going to say you’re weak for quitting.