Summary

The article emphasizes the importance of acknowledging and accepting one's emotional responses during challenging times, such as the current pandemic, and finding personal coping mechanisms.

Abstract

The author of the article, Carolyn Riker, a psychotherapist, shares a personal experience of feeling overwhelmed and the need to find solace in simple comforts like the presence of her cat. She reassures readers that it's normal to have varied emotional reactions, whether it's crying, shouting, or staying quiet, and that there's no right or wrong way to feel. The article encourages individuals to trust their instincts on what feels right for them, whether that's engaging with the abundance of information and support groups available or choosing to step back and seek solitude. Riker highlights the importance of self-care activities and the unique ways people can cope with the current crisis, emphasizing that the pandemic's impact is not uniform and that each person's method of managing stress will differ. The article concludes with an invitation to readers to explore their own stories and healing processes during this period of seclusion.

Opinions

It's important to listen to one's own needs and not feel pressured to participate in activities or groups that don't resonate.
Emotional reactions, such as crying or feeling overwhelmed, are valid and should be acknowledged rather than suppressed.
Personal coping strategies, like engaging with nature, music, reading, writing, meditation, and exercise, are crucial for mental health during the pandemic.
The author believes in the power of storytelling and personal reflection as tools for navigating through crises.
There is an understanding that the pandemic affects individuals differently, and thus, a one-size-fits-all approach to coping is ineffective.
The article suggests that by staying secluded, individuals can discover new ways to connect and share their experiences, leading to personal growth and new narratives.

It’s Okay if You Need to Cry

Trust what makes you feel better and safer

Last night, when I finally sat down, I could tell every single fiber in me was jarred. The sound of the TV startled me. I couldn’t find my zero. The world felt scratchy and the air hurt my being.

Tears were at the surface tension phase — not quite ready to flow because they were and still are bracing for the unknown.

It wasn’t just one or two things that worried me, but a global effect.

I had to find my cat. He’s like a weighted blanket without feeling suffocated and there’s a bonus — he purrs.

When I finally reached my bed and the sounds of the house settled to quiet, it was well past midnight. I listened until these words drew me true and I will share them with you.

It’s okay if you need to cry, or shout, or to stay quiet. Your reactions and emotions are all okay. We don’t need to react the same way.

There’s a ton of information on the screen. Groups are sprouting up everywhere. This can feel wonderful or overwhelming. Pick and choose what feels right for you.

If it feels too much, there’s no obligation to join, or watch, or do.

I know this might sound simple, but for some of us we’ve been conditioned to not want to hurt feelings and go along, by saying yes, when our hearts are crying, and our heads are shaking– please, no more. Our hands are raised with a firm by gentle stop. I know I find myself backing way up and going inward.

I cling to the cloud commas quoting the sky’s simplicity. The voices of my own and with those alone, are coupled with the sequestered nations that we are.

The hugs that can’t be found. We rub our own arms and wrap ourselves into a knitted frequency of hope and love and touch. We ride the waves of our ups and downs.

Sometimes our vessel flips, and we grow gills and swim against the current of our panic counting the river rocks touching our fins until we resume our humanness.

This pandemic is difficult. There’s no way to brush away the fears that are real.

Yet, there are ways that are unique to us that can help.

I know nature clothes me. Music fills me. Reading weaves me. Writing is an extension of my soul. Meditation is a holy disassociation. Stretching feels me. Walking reminds me I am whole.

Together we will find our ways to cope, listen, share and understand.

This crisis is not — one-size-fits-all.

Trust what makes you feel better. I believe each day we stay secluded we invite a new story to unfold.

Carolyn Riker, MA, LMHC, is a psychotherapist and author of three books. Her latest is My Dear, Love Hasn’t Forgotten You. If you’d like, follow her on Facebook at Carolyn Riker, MA, LMHC or Instagram.

It’s Okay if You Need to Cry

Trust what makes you feel better and safer

If it feels too much, there’s no obligation to join, or watch, or do.

This story is published in a Few Words, Medium’s publication that only accepts stories under 500 words.

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