Summary

The article discusses the societal tendency to blame victims for the crimes committed against them, a phenomenon rooted in the just-world hypothesis, which suggests that people get what they deserve.

Abstract

The article "It’s Not Them, It’s Us" delves into the concept of victim-blaming, illustrating how individuals often hold victims responsible for their misfortunes, such as a family not locking their door and getting robbed. It ties this behavior to the just-world hypothesis, the belief that the world is fair and that people's actions will result in appropriate consequences. The author criticizes this mindset, pointing out its flaws through the tragic story of Pınar Gültekin, a woman murdered in Turkey, whose death led to victim-blaming rather than focusing on the perpetrator's actions. The article argues that this societal response is a defense mechanism to maintain the illusion of a just world, where if one acts 'correctly,' they can avoid being victimized, despite the reality that such tragedies can happen to anyone regardless of their actions.

Opinions

The author suggests that victim-blaming is a common, often subconscious, reaction to crimes, where the victim is held accountable for the incident.
The just-world hypothesis is seen as a psychological defense to cope with the randomness and injustice of the world.
Blaming victims for crimes like robbery, rape, or murder is criticized as it shifts focus from the perpetrator's wrongdoing to the victim's alleged mistakes.
The article implies that the advice given to prevent such crimes is often impractical and fails to address the root cause of the problem, which is the perpetrators' behavior.
The author emphasizes that no one deserves to be a victim of a crime, regardless of their actions or choices.
The societal response to Pınar Gültekin's murder is highlighted as a stark example of how victim-blaming can overshadow the gravity of the perpetrator's actions.

It’s Not Them, It’s Us

You can’t blame a bad person for being bad, but you can always blame a good person for not being good enough.

Once upon a time, there was a very wealthy family. They had a wonderful house with fancy furniture and an expensive TV. And one day, they left their beautiful house for a family vacation and they didn’t even lock the door.

That night burglars came in and stole everything the family had. All that they worked so hard for was now simply gone. Horrible, right?

But I know what you are thinking. Because I’m thinking the same thing. What was the family thinking leaving a house like that without locking the door? What happened was kind of inevitable, they had it coming.

This wouldn’t have happened to me or you. We know better than them.

Victim-blaming occurs when the victim of a crime or any wrongful act is held entirely or partially at fault for the harm that befell them. I’m sure you’ve heard of the term before. I’m sure you even did it yourself without even realizing it. But have you ever wondered why we do it?

Ironically, it is linked to the just-world hypothesis. As the name suggests, it is the idea that everyone deserves what happens to them. In a world full of injustice, it’s relieving to believe that no action will be left without a consequence.

Your noble actions will eventually be rewarded and everyone that has ever done wrong will be punished. It all sounds so fair until something horrible happens to someone innocent. It damages our just-world belief. Moreover, it means something bad can happen to us too even if we did nothing wrong. Such a disturbing thought.

We are so weak that instead of facing reality, we interpret the situation so that it will be in line with our just-world belief. The victim must have done something wrong. I wouldn’t have done the same mistake, so this would never happen to me.

Last week in Turkey, a young woman named Pınar Gültekin was strangled, put in a barrel, and burned by a man. After hearing a story like this, you would expect people to blame the murderer. Instead, they were discussing women’s poor judgment in choosing men.

Turkish social media was full of people giving advice to women on not to be killed by a man:

Don’t date a guy who doesn’t put his chair back to its place in a restaurant.

Don’t date a guy who doesn't pet a street animal.

Don’t date a guy who raises his voice to his mother.

Great recommendations. If only Pınar had known about these very smart tricks. But why do I feel like nothing she could have done would prevent this from happening?

Why do I feel like no one deserves to be killed because of their inability to recognize a murderer?

Do you see what’s wrong with this story? Do you see what’s wrong with every story where someone gets hurt, raped, robbed, or killed? We never really hate the villain. We don’t question their behaviors. We don’t question their existence.

After all, there can’t be a world without bad people, right? That’s a childish thought. There will always be burglars, rapists, and murderers. Those people can’t change. So we should change instead.

We should lock our doors, so they won’t rob us.

We should dress more appropriately, so they won’t rape us.

We should choose the right man, so he won’t kill us.