PERSONAL: RELATIONSHIPS AND ABUSE

It’s All About Sex

You are dirty-minded

Why is it so normal that everything is about sex? Don’t get me wrong. I love having sex. I love talking about sex. But there’s a right place and time for it — and a wrong place and time.

The supermarket is definitely one of the latter. Let me explain what happened.

I went to the supermarket to buy fruit. My toddler was with me. She had one of those cute little kid shopping carts. By the way, those hurt when you get them shoved in your heels. Don’t let the size fool you.

Back to the story. My kid and I love all kinds of fruit: apples, pears, oranges, passion fruit, and especially bananas. We have bananas almost every day. In any case, there is no way around the fruit section.

In our local supermarket, there are boxes against food waste. For example, there are apples with small blemishes, single bananas, and soft avocados with discounts.

I like to buy one or two items from that box, in addition to my normal shopping. My kid and I usually eat those right when we get home.

Today, as we do every time, we stood in front of the box of “less nice” fruit. My left hand is on the kid’s shopping cart. You remember, they hurt when you get them in your heels.

To keep my kid from hitting me or other customers, I hold her cart every once in a while. She stood next to me, on tiptoe. Peering into the box, trying to grab an avocado from further back.

It was clear without a doubt that the child belonged to me.

Another customer standing next to me in the fruit section. A little too close, considering Corona and that the supermarket wasn’t busy.

He was looking at me, I could see that out of the corner of my eye. He was standing by the vegetables near us before and looked over.

I didn’t think anything of it then. Now, however, it was noticeable.

The man was clearly older than me. I estimated him to be in his late 50s, maybe even older. I began to feel uncomfortable.

I could feel his gaze on me. When my child is with me, I find it even more uncomfortable.

If I had been alone, I would have either walked on quickly or even looked at him. Then he would have either felt caught and embarrassed or continued to stare. In the latter case, I would have asked if I could help him.

True, I know he probably wouldn’t ask me for directions to the milk shelf. But polite confrontation sometimes helps people leave you alone.

With my child with me, though, I’m very reserved. You never know how people will react when they feel attacked or caught. So I quickly grabbed the avocado for my kid and put it in her cart. Then the obligatory single banana.

An employee once explained to me, unfortunately, they rarely buy them individually. That’s why single bananas are put in the box against food waste.

Even if they are spotless. The happier I am when I get a bargain in the process. 😋🍌

With the banana in my hand, I turn to the car and to my child. I am about to put it in. The man watches me. Has come a little closer and is not even a meter next to us.

That would be strange even without Corona in the almost empty supermarket. I see in spite of the mask at his mimic that he grins. Now I look directly at him. I am confused. He looks directly at me and grins.

Not a friendly our-eyes-just-randomly-meet-and-greet smile. Not politely reserved. Barely noticeable with the masks on his face. But a strong, noticeable laugh all over the face. Some of you will know exactly what I mean.

His gaze wanders to my hand, in which I still hold the banana. He looks at me again. Again at my hand. Nods several times and says “I’d like that”.

Still grinning, he keeps walking. Around the corner of the next shelf and is gone. There is a wrong, very wrong time and place for sexual innuendo.

When we’re strangers. Then you should assume it’s inappropriate. When I’m in the supermarket. Especially with a child.

I have to correct myself. That’s not a sexual innuendo, that’s sexual harassment. It’s highly inappropriate, in so many ways.

Some people have no decency and should be ashamed of themselves. Thank you for reading and for not being like that guy!

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