It Won’t Get Better

Summary

The poem "It Won’t Get Better" reflects on the enduring pain of loss and the inadequacy of well-intentioned advice.

Abstract

"It Won't Get Better" is a poignant poem that delves into the deep-seated sorrow that accompanies the loss of a loved one. The author, Jonathan Greene, conveys the persistent and overwhelming nature of grief, which he likens to a "planet of pain" that resides in the pit of his stomach. Despite the common reassurances that "it will get better," the poem suggests that such sentiments are often expressed by those who have not experienced profound loss and therefore cannot comprehend the void it leaves. The author expresses a preference for the depth of despair over improvement, as the intensity of his grief is a testament to the magnitude of his love and loss. The poem concludes with a copyright notice and a link to another work by the author, titled "Talk To Me."

Opinions

The author believes that the pain of loss does not diminish over time, contrary to what others may suggest.
Well-meaning advice from people who have not suffered a significant loss can feel like a dismissal of the author's grief.
The author finds a perverse comfort in the profound depth of despair, as it serves as a reminder of the love that was lost.
The poem suggests that the process of grieving is not about seeking improvement or moving on, but about honoring the impact of the lost loved one.
The author implies that the memory of the loved one is sacred, and any attempt to alleviate the pain of loss can feel like a betrayal of that memory.

A Poem

It won’t get better this feeling I have in the pit of my stomach that has metastasized into a planet of pain

Over the years so many people want you to know that it will get better but that’s only because they haven’t experienced loss and don’t know what a hole feels like that won’t close and also plays home movies on a projector, on a loop from your heart

It’s not their fault that they don’t know and offer advice that stabs at the memory of your loved one because all we want to do is to grieve, in lieu of having them back and we don’t want it to be better because then the impact of our loss will be lessened and if I’m being honest, the depth of despair is what feels good, in the worst way imaginable, because it reminds me how much I loved and how much I lost

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