Is Your Social Circle a Cage?
“Accountability is the glue that ties commitment to the result.” — Bob Proctor
I was listening to my favorite podcasters while cleaning out my fridge when I learned that Bob Proctor, personal development legend, passed away at the age of 87.
I threw out the jar of expired pickles as Jake Ducey, a student and close friend of Proctor’s for the past 9 years, broke the news on his You Tube Channel. Jake shared the origin story of their relationship, the advice that changed his life, and the final conversation he had with Proctor before his death.
Jake and Bob met when he was 21 years old, through their mutual literary agent. Jake interviewed Bob and at the end, quoted a passage from his future mentor’s favorite book, “Think and Grow Rich.”
In the book, Andrew Carnegie, who at the time was the wealthiest man in the world, asked author Napoleon Hill to gather the raw data for the classic “Think and Grow Rich.” Carnegie told Hill to look in the mirror and say, “Andrew Carnegie, I will not only equal your achievements in life, but I will catch you at the post and I will pass you at the grandstand.”
At the end of Jake’s interview with Bob, he repurposed the quote, and said to him: “Bob Proctor, I will not only equal your achievements in life, but I will catch you at the post and I will pass you at the grandstand.” Bob burst out in laughter and, admiring his cheek, exchanged numbers with the aspiring entrepreneur, beginning a friendship that would last until he died.
Bob had a nose for rationalization and would not allow Jake to place the blame on his age as to why he had not yet realized his dreams of being a successful author. Bob said rationalizing was “rationing lies”! He told Jake to stop making excuses; if 11-year-olds can become millionaires, then why not Jake?
Bob advised Jake to write his aspirations on a note card and challenged him to make his yearly income his monthly income. He wrote “I am a world successful author and speaker, inspiring millions of people and earning millions of dollars,” and “I am so happy and grateful now that money comes to me in increasing quantities from many sources on a continuous basis.” He looked at the notecards as often as possible.
Bob and Jake touched base every month for a progress report and to see where tweaks could be made to rewire his paradigm. To cement his new self-concept, Bob suggested that Jake buy a speaker pillow to listen to a recording of the affirmations as he slept. It was from this simple practice that Jake was inspired to practice self-hypnosis to re-program the subconscious mind.
Some amazing things happened. Jake did indeed become a millionaire. He has authored best-selling books and reached millions through his viral videos and podcast appearances. The declarations he recorded and wrote on note cards all manifested into his reality.
In retrospect, Bob’s presence was a gamechanger. Bob understood that accountability was critical to bringing dreams to life. Buoyed by Bob’s confidence in him, regardless of his age and lack of education, Jake felt responsible to make a return on Bob’s investment.
As I finished the kitchen project that I had put off for weeks, I reflected on the other spaces in my life where I fell short of my ambitions. The projects in limbo for months or years were a testimony to the need for a framework that would help me bridge the gap from intentions to results.
Like Jake, what I needed was a swift kick to my assumption that the best time to start is “tomorrow “when I’m smarter/thinner/confident. The suffering I felt from not acting was entirely under my control, much to my chagrin, and not because of global warming, the election, or my family obligations. I had no idea where I was going, and my results reflected this aimlessness.
“You are the only problem you will ever have, and you are the only solution. Change is inevitable, personal growth is always a personal decision.” — Bob Proctor
Harnessing the power of accountability proved to be elusive on my own. As I ticked off another year on my calendar with an unfinished manuscript, I surrendered control to God. My rational mind did not have all the answers, so I gave it all to Him.
Spoiler alert: He delivered. I reconnected with a dear friend of mine, Toni Greathouse, who like me, was experiencing a life/career evolution. It was no coincidence that we were both rediscovering our soul’s calling — and from that point forward vowed to honor the creative expression we’d put off for “tomorrow.” On the spot, we agreed to be accountability partners, committing to making real progress toward the lives we wanted to create.
As we excitedly discussed our strategy for success, we promised to leave our egos at the door and exercise tough love when necessary to get the job done. Providing honest feedback while being each other’s “ride or die” in our creative journeys gave us the strength to soldier on, savoring the triumphs and seeing setbacks as opportunities in disguise.
When Jake wondered why Bob coached him for free, when students would willingly pay him thousands of dollars for his time, Bob simply said their prosperity and self-improvement centered conversations raised his own frequency. Jake’s positive momentum forward magnetized more of what aligned with this vibration, raising the collective frequency of the people in his circle. It was the Law of Attraction in real time.
Likewise, my creative partnership with Toni activates a positive vibration for my mind and body. As we encourage each other to meet our weekly milestones, it is no surprise that opportunities greater than we could have imagined appear in our reality with each step, great or small. To others, we may seem to have all the luck, when in fact our high frequency collaboration has provided the substrate for abundance to blossom.
Jake’s recollection of his final conversation with Bob resonated with me on deep level, as I have been processing the deaths of several family members and making radical changes in my life as a result.
During their monthly call, Jake teased Bob about his advancing age and asked about his thoughts on his mortality. Bob said that he had no fear of transitioning and was excited to see what was next. He knew he lived an extraordinary life and understood that he was a spiritual being living in a physical body.
Bob conquered the fear of death by truly living life. What I learned from Bob is that fear is nothing more than an illusion and has no more power than what we give to it.
“If you look at the people in your social circle and don’t get inspired then you don’t have a circle. You have a cage.” — Bob Proctor
As Toni and I embark on 2022 as accountability partners, we will tackle the fear of failure and the fear of success, expressing gratitude for the blessings we receive as we are transformed from the inside out. We are excited to chronicle our journey as we make quantum leaps in our results and reach our full potential.