Relationships and technology

How To Connect Is So Important

To connect is to live life to the full

As I sit at my desk isolated from the physical beings of my fellow man, isolated from the natural physical being of the earth outside of these four walls, isolated from my very own true inner being as a sociable animal, two words come to the forefront of my mind, 'Only Connect.'

Reflecting on this two word phrase, a phrase I first came across in the novel 'Howards End' by E.M.Forster, I have come to realise that of all of my physical interactions during my entire life have brought a myriad of experiences, good, bad and indifferent, I have learned and grown an enormous amount. It matters not the nature, the tone, the texture and the colour of those interactions, the important thing is to connect.

In whatever field of endeavour we find ourselves, it is connectivity and the close contact with physical dimensions with the outside world and all who populate it that helps us to develop and to grow as human beings. So what happens when we are assigned to live in glass rooms, isolated from all, in all but sight and sound?

The internet has in many ways been a godsend during these pandemic days. Via the plastic and metal machine that is the home computer and the world wide web, we have been able to soldier through some of our darkest days. Skype and Zoom have replaced physical visits to our families and friends in their homes and other social meeting points such as bars and restaurants Likewise we are electronically connected to our colleagues very far from our normal places of work. In this way the machine has been a great enabler of connectivity.

And yet in many ways the machine can also be seen as a disabler, or a blocker to that all important 3D physical dimension. The Covid pandemic has in effect driven a biological wedge between us that denies us any sort of physical connectivity and has left us with the only choice of a computer, iPad or mobile phone.

So is the internet something which pushes us further apart or which brings us closer together? I would say both, at one and the same time. And I happen to believe that although our present pandemic situation has thrown the spotlight on the effects of the internet, the seeds of this dichotomy could be seen long before Covid 19 befell us.

Many has been the time that I have seen a group of young girls sat on a street bench in close physically proximity and yet all totally disconnected as they all had their heads buried in texting somebody else not physically not present. There are in fact many examples of people being present but disconnected with their immediate surroundings. A man using his mobile phone as he drives his car or truck. A woman on a date in a fancy restaurant with some handsome beau choosing to engage with a female friend on her mobile phone. And that is just the beginning.

I once read somewhere that the one thing which drives the internet is pornography. Sexual gratification is not a physical activity any more, it is a singular activity with images on a screen. And now, with the advent of sex toys such as vibrators and increasingly realistic sex dolls, it makes one wonder exactly where is humanity and society as we once knew it headed?

I am a little knowledgeable about three countries, the United Kingdom, Spain and Japan. And it is not lost on me that in all three countries birth rates have been in decline for at least the last decade. I am sure that the reasons for this are manifold, but I would certainly apportion a degree of blame on the internet and its easy, private access to sexual gratification.

On a positive note the internet has enabled the democratisation of information and knowledge. And yet, we have also seen the democratisation of ignorance and poverty. Perhaps the saddest loss of all has been the diminution of our humanity and spirituality, our sense of being in this thing called life together.

Yes, we do still connect, but it is very far from the touch it and feel it experience of actual physical contact. And from where I am sat, in a physical void, the sort of connection we have leaves an awful lot to be desired in terms of learning and growing. The fearful part of this path that we are on is that it is one which will ultimately lead us all to our own demise. No matter how like the real thing computer life is, it is incapable of many things such as emotion and spirituality and above of all of producing living organic babies for the perpetuation of our species.