Introverts are Awesome

Introvert:

Drawing energy from within, reflectors — having to mull things over, seemingly silent but don’t go for “chewing the fat” (small talk). Not always shy but like to take their time responding, and may be reserved or aloof. Don’t always appear approachable but gives quality or thoughtful considered responses, and re-charges by spending time alone.

This is my definition of an introvert and I am one. Although reading as a means of communicating to me, and writing as a means of communicating from me, are my first loves, I am always aware that if I met you face-to-face that I may become shy.

I might give a wry nervous grin or look the other way or pretend to fiddle with something so that I can cover up my face. I am not an extrovert, out-going and really confident, and liking to draw “energy” from others, i.e. energized by talking and relating and perhaps bonding to another. If I am walking down the street and people stare at me, I think to myself “What is it, do I have two heads or something?” I don’t like being looked at. I am an introvert.

Introverts tend to not like to be in the “lime-light” or in the spot-light when it comes to a physical presence.

Sure I would love my written pieces on Medium to be well-read and liked or used, but if you asked me to be filmed in a documentary for my views on adoption or on writing or any topic relevant to my experiences, I would likely say “Yes but only if you use my first name and only if you show a darkened silhouette of me.”

Isn’t this contradictory? Why would introverts be happy to be famous through their writing as a “writer with their full name, or a pen-name (pseudonym)” but not want to have their faces plastered on television or other visual media necessarily?

The answer, my friend is “blowing in the wind.”

Well, introverts are good at dodging the question sometimes, LOL. But seriously, the answer is that written words, while indeed conveying messages with nuances picked up according to the reader’s background, and while communicating knowledge, are relatively “safe” words. They are on paper or on a computer screen, not being said aloud and in person by the writer, and the distance between the writer and the reader maintains a level of anonymity.

Writing is a form of manipulation of concepts that started of as sounds, with advanced language erupting from humankind’s keenness to connect to each other through transferring meaning or intention speedily and efficiently in code.

I have been writing since I learned how to write English at kindergarten, 50 years ago. During that time I used the first online messenger services, and forums such as Yuku, Ning, MySpace and Mixxt. Through trial and error I learned that the first thing to do is to check one’s Privacy Settings on these online vehicles for communication. The second thing is to “set your face to the East” — not really (but it sounds good), it is to plan what and why you will write.

Teenagers are told don’t share personal contact information on Facebook and other Social Media and this is a pearl of wisdom, that I hope all causal online Medium writers, whether introvert or extrovert, take heed of. If you are a “branded” writer or a published author or a legal company, then for the sake of facilitating filtered contact, yes you may divulge your address and / or telephone details. It’s a vast world of readership out there and what you write may be one person’s “cup of tea” but not another. Don’t bait the trolls right to your door-step!

As an introvert running multiple WordPress blogs also, I have had to learn to deal with negative feedback, for example when I first set up my blog “Fascinating Animals” lots of people with nothing much to do, emailed me saying that my website was pathetic because it did not have a complete A to Z dictionary of animals. At first this upset and stressed me out because I had indeed started a Page with the letters of the alphabet but hadn’t filled in much.

Lo and behold I found that such an alphabetical listing of animals already existed online, so of course, I scrapped that idea.

Listen up readers, we writers are not “Houdinis” nor do we own crystal balls, so you, the rabble (or at least unenlightened people who don’t appreciate things enough but want instant gratification) should be more realistic and think about the person behind the blog. She just like you, is still learning things, and is not perfect.

This brings me back to the theme of this Medium article. It is quite easy for me to admire the writers of the Stories that I read here on Medium and elsewhere, with the thought at the back of my head “Wow that person is a terrific writer” or “Awesome author” or similar.

I may even compare a person’s writing to mine and think that another writer is way better than me, but it only just occurred to me that I think that I do this (and I’m trying not to) because I am an introvert.

As an introvert I need to be more open to gestures of appreciation and to sincere acknowledgement of the “talented Ms Me”. Introverts should stop “hiding their light under a bushel” (i.e. keeping their talents and skills hidden) if that is what they do, and should honor themselves or start accepting credit for their talents and skills.

There’s no need to think that you are not as interesting or as good a writer as the next person. Introverts and extroverts and in-between are really awesome.