Poetry
In the Darkest Times a Light Still Shines
The power of faith
I’ve been walking along life’s highway Trying to find the place I left my soul How long will it take me to get there When I find it, I will know I’m whole
I stumbled north and I traveled south I tiptoed east then I wandered west Well I know it’s got to be somewhere When I find it, I will get my rest
I’m running along every byway Hurried days fade into scurried nights Now short of breath, feeling close to death Help me find it, then I’ll be alright
Swim Life’s rivers, shiver in her snow Intrepid scout, cast my eyes about Seeking faith, must be hiding somewhere When discovered, I will sing and shout
Doubt creeps in Sears my skin Scrapes my shins Ego grins “I shall win” My head spins
Now I’m crawling along, trying sideways Going forward, between and spinning round Plead “where are you — I am so afraid? So rudderless, without you earthbound”
Limbs lurch, broken boughs, weary somehow Don’t know where else to look any more Then a gentle cry from deep inside My soul is waiting at heart’s door
This week’s prompt from 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘢 𝘊. reinforces my belief in synchronicity.
The poem began life as lyrics I wrote in 1998, I was fine-tuning it last week but hadn’t finished or published it.
My first thought when I saw the subtitle All things faith, was “That’s the one — the timing’s perfect!”
The song was an 8-bar blues format (I still read it in that rhythm) written two years before my final massive mental meltdown at the start of the millennium. The idea originated from the 1973 song Man and God by Sonny Terry and Brownie Mcgee.
These words speak to the inner light I sought. Even on my darkest days, I could detect a faint glimmer. I never abandoned hope. My faith in a higher power, which gifted me this life, kept me going.
I grew up Church of England and didn’t complete my later conversion to Judaism; then explored other religions, but now I embrace whatever resonates with my soul. As Diana says, there’s no right or wrong way. Neither does God favour one over the other. I respect whichever spiritual road a person travels.
I don’t find it strange that I consider my seven-week tenure as an in-patient at the psychiatric hospital a blessing.
Even gaining admittance was a miracle. Because of our a friendship with a psychologist at the apartment block where we lived, my husband organised through him for me to attend an interview at the state clinic where treatment was free.
They must have picked up on my faith and determination and admitted me right away. I worked hard every moment on healing my depression, which had lingered for six years. With professional guidance, I walked and talked my way through the terror of agoraphobia.
With an open heart, devoid of fear, I came out the other side in one Peace.
Two decades on, I’m still here. Body, Mind and Spirit!
I leave you with Sonny Terry and Brownie McGee singing God and Man
Thank you for being here.
