Sexuality

I’m Retired; If You Think I Dress Like a Working Girl, That’s on You

Mind your business

“Now that I’m 91, as opposed to being 90, I’m much wiser. I’m much more aware and I’m much sexier.” — Betty White

In our society, some have distinct opinions on how a woman older than fifty should look and act. I am not one of them. Growing up, we had the role models of our older aunties. They cooked, cleaned, washed, sewed, gardened, and helped the younger generations succeed. Often, they were up early and went to bed very late, and they looked it.

While the aunts took care of themselves, it was informal self-care. Always dressed sharp on Sunday for church, they were very casual the rest of the week. On Sunday, it was their best clothing, hats, lipstick. The dress was modest and stylish, the make-up was perfect but honey, the hats were wild and accented their outfits. The rest of the week, they wore regular house dresses.

I’m now over fifty. I do not wear loose great-grandma house dresses. I take care of myself. Waxing, moisturizing, and lashing myself. I work on getting at least seven hours of sleep a night and have an expensive under-eye cream to hide dark circles. I walk thirty minutes three times a week. My clothing is comfortable but stylish. Some things are deliberately sexy. I’m married, but I am not dead. Neither is my spouse.

I had on a fitted top with slits on the front, my nice butt-shaping jeans, and no bra with Peter Pan black heeled boots. You couldn’t see my nipples poking out because I had on adhesive nipple pads, but you could see the curve of my breasts as the top had a cut out at the cleavage.

We recently went to a friend’s outdoor party. I had on a fitted top with slits on the front, my nice butt-shaping jeans, and no bra with Peter Pan black heeled boots. You couldn’t see my nipples poking out because I had on adhesive nipple pads, but you could see the curve of my breasts as the top had a cutout at the cleavage.

The jeans were denim, with sparkles at the knees, ankles, and along the outer seams. I added my leather tie belt and felt good about my looks. On this day, I did not have on a wig. My voluminous natural curly hair is cut short. I’ve emphasized the grey on the short sides by making it sparkle and dyed the longer top dark blue. But, I have some delicious long wigs which I sometimes wear.

I creamed and moisturized my face, adding my false lashes, lipstick, and highlighter, no foundation. I put on my big giraffe earrings. The lipstick was a bright purplish taupe that matches my natural lip color. My spouse liked the ultimate result and told me so as we left our house.

One lady my age at our table gave me the once over. She kept staring at me until I asked if there was something she needed. Her answer surprised me. “You dress like a young woman; what are you trying to prove?” Since we were out in public, I said, “Yes, I do.” She continued, “I think it is a shame women trying to hold on to their youth to get a man.” I replied, “Let me introduce you to my husband,” as my spouse sat down. “Honey, this is…” “Macy,” she said. I made a deal of looking around the table, waiting for her to introduce whatever man she came with, turning my head left and right a few times. There was none.

Yes, I know I was bitchy at the moment, but she didn’t know me. Macy said, “I think there is just a way older women should dress once they get over a certain age. You are trying too hard.” I smiled, “I’m not trying at all. If I want to dress like a prostitute, it is none of your business. You don’t like the way I’m dressed, my titties bothering you, I’ll change tables, there is plenty of room.” So, we did.

When we got to the other table, my spouse said, “What was that about?” I answered I did not know, but, my appearance triggered some past trauma for her to say something to me. Maybe I looked like the woman her husband left her for, I don’t know, and I don’t care. The rest of the gathering went without incident. We had an enjoyable time social distancing outside with our friends, drinking and dancing most of the afternoon.

I was not even angry. I worked a full-time job for decades, being a wife and mother for most of that. I perform everyday older women tasks, calling and counseling, and helping everywhere I can in my family. Some days, I wear animal print pajamas all day. Other times I may be dressed like a working girl. Either way, ain’t nobody’s business but my own.

Toni Crowe retired as the Vice President of Operations to pursue her dream of being a writer. Toni has written six books, two of which won the 2019 Reader’s Choice Gold Awards. Her bestselling business book, “Bullets and Bosses Don’t Have Friends: How Do You Manage A Man Sitting With His Dick in His Hand?” was one of the winners. Her first book, “Never a $7 Whore” was the other.

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