I’m Looking Forward to my Next Failure
It’s the only way I can ever hope to succeed.
Failure gets a bad rap. It’s a label that is degrading and embarrassing. Failure epitomizing everything that is wrong. It is the opposite of success. It is rock bottom on the ladder of success. Failure makes you hang your head in shame. It causes despair and, often, depression. At its worst, failure stops you in your tracks — maybe permanently. So why am I looking forward to my next opportunity to fail? Why would anyone in their right mind want to willingly wish such feelings of inadequacy on themselves or on anyone they cared about? The answer is simple.
There is no other path to success.
Success is not a straight line from where you are now to your ultimate goal. Anyone who tells you differently is either lying to you or has very small goals. Failure shows you everything wrong and teases you with the enticing possibilities of doing it right the next time.
Let’s take a minute to break “Failure” down and look at it under a microscope. Does Your “F” Stand for “Fear” or “Faith?” Fear is huge in the definition of failure. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of looking like a fool for even trying. If there is one single word that gives failure its backbone, it’s fear. It drapes a blanket of anxiety over every part of every dream, aspiration and goal. Fear packs a mighty muscle — if you let it. The best way to beat down fear is with another great “F” word — Faith. It doesn’t have to be a religious faith, although it could be. It really just has to be your ability to strongly believe — in yourself, in your dream or in your future. Faith is belief. It is the strong positive attitude you need to continue on in the face of adversity.
Is There an “A” in Your Future Success? The funny thing about fear is how it aligns itself with another roadblock to success — Anger. While fear may stop you in your tracks, anger will make sure you suffer for it. Anger can make you do or say things you will regret. Anger will never propel you forward and, much like fear, can sap your strength and derail every bit of forward momentum. On the other hand, you can build up your strength with a better “A” word — Allies. These are the people who can help you succeed. They offer support when you need it. They supply constructive criticism where it can do some good. They believe in you, sometimes even when you don’t believe in yourself.
The “I’s” Have It. The “I’s” can have a double-barrel impact against you. Feelings of Inadequacy can make you doubt your worth or your ability to perform. This leads to another negative “I” — Impatience. If your progress in reality doesn’t match the perceived progress you think you should be making, all the foot stamping and saber rattling in the world won’t help. The only “I” that can combat the twin punches of inadequacy and impatience is a pretty powerful one — Initiative. With initiative, you can pick up any broken pieces of your efforts and continue on, building knowledge and strength as you go. Initiative helps you figure out new and potentially better ways to reach your goal. The only time failure marks the end of the road is when you let it.
As Far as the Eye Can See What do you see what you look at your odds of succeeding in whatever you have set as a goal? Is it a hazy, dark blur (Lack of vision) or do you see a vast horizon (Limitless opportunity)? The way failure affects you will be largely determined by the limits you place on yourself. If you can’t see any opportunity in front of you, it is highly unlikely you will stumble across it by accident. If you see nothing but unlimited success coming your way, you will vastly increase the odds of it happening.
Do you know where you’re going? The pathway to success is never a straight line — there’s no question about that. However, you really do need some general idea of where you will zig and zag on your way to the stars. If you’re Uncertain you could falter in a cesspool of paralysis — never going anywhere because you’re really not sure where to go. That wish-washy attitude needs to be replaced with a sense of Urgency. Urgency forces you to act, to be reactive, to be proactive, to find a way to make some forward momentum no matter what else is happening.
Don’t cry over spilt milk Some actions and decisions will be wrong — there’s no getting around it. It is, in fact, part of the human condition to try and fail.
Dwelling on what went wrong will leave you wallowing in a pool of Regret. Regret is like a pair of handcuffs that lock you forever in the past, never allowing you to move past your mistakes into a field of progress and success. Mistakes have to be dealt with another way — with Recovery. Recovery lets you look at what you’ve done, evaluate the good and the bad about the experience and move on. You may never get over what went wrong, but you will have knowledge and experience from which to build future success.
It’s not all about you We tend to think the credit/blame for any outcome is based solely on what we did or didn’t do. Ego can push us forward to do bigger and better things. It can also be a vain monster that allows us to think we are too good to have to pay the price for our successes. An out of control ego does not work well with others and can leave its bearer isolated, alone and without the alliances needed to succeed.
Instead of ego, the only way to overcome failure is with Endurance — the ability to continue on in the face of seemingly insurmountable obstacles.
At the end of the day, the only way to successfully look at failure is with the eye of a victor — one who can use Faith, Alliances, Initiative, Limitless vision, a sense of Urgency, the ability to Recover and a strong sense of Endurance — to turn that failure into a stepping stone to ultimate success.
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