BBB Submission Guidelines, Capiche?

If You Want Me to Publish Your Shit

Submission Guidelines for the BBB Family of Publications

Good morning, my friends. The Godfather of Medium has decided to spell out a few basic rules and regulations for the Bouncin’ and Behavin’ family of publications. This little sit-down has been long overdue.

This was not intentional, and should not be taken as a sign of disrespect. The Godfather has just been busy carving out his own little place amongst the other Medium writers on the platform. I’ve been building this funny little writing business and creating more opportunities for other Medium writers. There’s room for you in the family if you follow a few basic guidelines.

I’m currently the only editor and approval person for all writing pieces coming into Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs, Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs TWO, and Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Fuckery, our humor pub. That’s a lot of reading and approvals needing to be given on a daily basis.

The Godfather of Medium is a busy fella. Until he recruits a couple of capos to assist with the heavy lifting, it can be a bit much every day. If you think you have what it takes to proofread, edit, and send messages to those who need it hear it, let me know in the comments. Bonus points if you’re Italian, but it’s not a disqualifier if you’re not.

Let’s talk about a few basics about what BBB, BBB2, and BBF are looking for in the writing pieces we publish. And some other things that will cause your articles to be rejected and dumped in the Hudson Bay, never to be seen again. Marone!

Don’t Send Us Writing Pieces Full of Errors

Please take the time to be thorough in your writing. Proofread it before sending it over. If my Grammarly lights it up and I see more red than the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre, it’s going to be rejected. I have a lot on my plate, so being able to quickly read and edit makes The Godfather happy.

Speaking of Grammarly, I highly recommend that you install it on your laptop or desktop. Especially if you struggle with spelling, grammar, and punctuation. If English isn’t your first language, it’s a really helpful resource. Not to mention, it’s free. It fell off a truck, if you will. Nobody knows nothin’ about nothin’.

We Don’t Accept Writing About Certain Topics

The BBB family of publications is pretty wide-open and diverse about the articles we publish. However, there are exceptions. I don’t want to see anything racist or bigoted, that’s completely unacceptable and ignorant. Those kinds of pieces won’t be published and I’ll probably call you an asshole for holding those kinds of views.

On a related note, any articles supporting and praising Donald Trump or the GOP will not be published. I likely won’t even finish reading them and you certainly won’t get the clap from me. I don’t support racist and bigoted criminals and their followers. Enough said about that.

We also don’t publish writing about business, tech stuff, crypto-currency, or anything completely boring that’s related to those topics. If you write a humorous piece about something related to those things, I’ll give it a look, but no guarantees. We’re trying to grow BBB and have some standards, so we mainly want articles that will appeal to the masses.

We Celebrate Diversity and Personal Writing Pieces

I love receiving submissions that support marginalized people, social justice, and mental health topics. If you are pro-LGBTQ, Black Lives Matter, and an ally for those who struggle with their mental health, you have a home here with us.

The BBB family of publications isn’t a place for daily posts about your day-to-day routine written in a journaling style. If you want to rant and rave about something with no real point to it, buy a diary. If you do find humor or learned a lesson about something personal you’ve gone through, send it my way. I love those kinds of personal stories.

Speaking of humor, anything from somewhat amusing to flat-out hilarious is always welcome. Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Fuckery is the perfect place for inappropriately funny humor writing. Though we also appreciate those articles in BBB and BBB2. Dealer’s choice, send it where you feel comfortable.

How to Become a Writer for the Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Publications

This is the question we get asked the most often: “How do I become a writer for Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs?” The simple answer to that is, “You don’t”.

But let me explain. BBB has grown into a difficult-to-manage publication in just 15 months. Difficult, because of the number of submissions I receive daily. Until I recruit some foot soldiers to assist with the proofreading and editing, we’re not accepting new writers for BBB. However, BBB2 is open for business and we welcome new and experienced writers both to the family there.

If you’d like to write for Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs TWO and/or for Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Fuckery, please email me at [email protected]. You can also leave a comment on this article, requesting to join the writing staff of either or both. I’m happy to bring you into the family.

If I see good things from you in either or both pubs, there could be a future for you in the original BBB. I do make occasional exceptions and promote writers to the main pub after they’ve proven themselves in BBB2 or BBF. So show us what you’re capable of and perhaps we’ll have a sit-down about making you a captain.

All in all, we have a lot of fun in the BBB family. I have a few rules and regulations regarding my publications, but I’m a good fella. I always try to be fair and help everyone I can. I’d love to add you to the family and see if we can make this business relationship beneficial to us both. &:^)

© 2023 Jason Provencio. All rights reserved.