If We Are Living In A Simulated Reality, Our Thoughts Are An Algorithm.
We’ve all been there. One minute you’re talking to your friend about how you need a new couch and 30 seconds later your Facebook page is flooded with Amazon ads promising an amazing Sofa delivered within 12 hours if you click now.
Sometimes I think my TikTok knows me better than my own mother, and as tempting as it is to place a sticky note over your laptop camera, throw on your tinfoil hat and hide in your underground bunker: we cannot escape the reality we were born into, but what if we could learn to manipulate it?
Growing up with an anxious attachment style, I was constantly searching for the love I couldn’t give myself in other people. This is basically the equivalent of asking someone if they remember where they left their keys before they lost them. Pointless.
My morning affirmations were things like: “Why doesn’t anyone choose me?” “I’m not good enough.” “I’m too much.” And perhaps most importantly, “why do I keep attracting the same partner who only reinforces these feelings?”
It wasn’t until my early 30’s I realized I wasn’t attracting what I wanted, I was attracting what I needed in order to break myself free of the chains I had placed on my own heart.
If I could talk to that little girl now I would tell her that she was never chosen because she needed to choose herself first, and she never felt loved because she gave away all that she had without reserving any for herself.
I’d tell her to look at everyone in her life as a mirror, reflecting a part of herself that had been hidden just waiting to be revealed. I’d tell her to thank every single one of them for helping her to get here.
We hear these things all the time, that our thoughts shape our reality, what we think we create, and just one small positive thought in the morning can change our entire day. No offense to whoever came up with that one, but sometimes I wake up screaming, and that’s ok too.
The truth is we can’t expect ourselves to think positive all the time, and we can’t just focus on ‘love and light’ because darkness becomes even darker the more we ignore it. What we can do is learn to observe our thoughts, not become them. We can learn to identify our own patterns instead of projecting them onto others.
We’ve been programmed to believe that we are in the passenger seat of our own lives, but what if we’ve been blindfolded in the drivers seat all along? Know that you are safe to remove the blindfold, and allow your intuition to do the navigating.
With gratitude,
S.