If I Were Not Me, I’ll Say This to Me

Summary

A reflective piece on personal growth and the importance of letting aspects of life develop naturally, underscored by the author's journey over a decade.

Abstract

The web content presents a poignant narrative of a man who frequently sought solace in solitary beach walks, often missing the serenity of his surroundings due to his inner turmoil. The story, spanning nearly 10 years, describes the man's struggle with worry and anxiety that blinded him to his blessings and left him feeling victimized by life. However, through his experiences, he learns to appreciate the present moment and understand the cyclic nature of life. The author, reflecting on this journey, advises to let life unfold without excessive worry, highlighting that many concerns are rooted in shortsightedness. The realization that life is not antagonistic but cyclical brings the man peace, and he learns to focus on having something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward to, allowing these aspects to develop on their own.

Opinions

The author suggests that constant worry and anxiety can prevent one from experiencing happiness and appreciating the present.
Personal presence and mindfulness, despite life's adversities, are portrayed as both a blessing and a curse, intensifying both positive and negative experiences.
The man's initial lack of faith and feeling of victimhood are understood as byproducts of consistent disappointments and negative experiences.
The narrative implies that a lack of resources or opportunities (e.g., never having been on a rollercoaster due to poverty) should not hinder one from understanding life's cycles.
The author emphasizes that life is cyclic and that perspectives of misfortune are often temporary, changing with circumstances.
The advice given is that instead of fixating on specific worries, one should focus on having meaningful pursuits, love, and hope, trusting in life's ebb and flow.
The author expresses gratitude for the lessons learned, particularly the understanding that life is not inherently against any individual.

What aspect of my life should I leave alone to develop on its own?

Nearly 10 years ago, he’ll often take lone walks to the beach — the beach is not so far from his house. If only his heart was always calm, maybe he would hear the waves. But it is not — so he doesn't hear the wind and the waves of the ocean. Instead, he would go to find them.

How many things in life has he allowed worry, anxiety to deafen him from hearing?

He doesn't know because he doth not pay attention. His eagerness to find what he doth not have has made him blind to the things he already has. Indeed they say;

“It is not the things we do not have that keeps us from being happy in life, it is the things we think we need.”

My only consolation for those long beach walks is that it leaves him happy — but only temporarily. When he is here, the world becomes colourful again — it smells fresh and better. He truly stays in the moment, take it all in. He appreciates every wave, every splash and every wind that hits his skin. He truly does know how to be present.

But that's the problem. Even in his misery, when things are bitter and brutal, and it feels like the world is against him, he takes it all in, just like he is taking in this beautiful view in front of him. He indeed does know how to be present. He feels things doubly. It is both his blessing and his curse.

Today seated on this beach, he imagined if others have it hard as he? He wonders, does the world hates others as she hates him? He ponders when will life, just like the tides comes in to wash the shores, wash the tears in his heart?

These are the moments I wail for him too.

These are the moments I wish he could see beyond today, beyond the now. He is without faith. But I understand. So I do not blame him. Disappointments, consistently, breeds scepticism and cynicism. Faith is hard when you’re feeling like a victim and have the evidence for it.

But if I have any message to give him as he sat on the beach, it would be, life is cyclic. Everything is turn-by-turn. Whatever goes up, will always come down. You’ve never been on a rollercoaster before because you are too poor to, but believe me, life is just like that. Sometimes it takes you down, and sometimes it lifts you up.

It is nearly 10 years today since he walked the beaches, and sat on its sands. And everything I wish he knew, he has learned. I am grateful!

But ultimately what I am most grateful for, of all the lessons he has learned, is that he now knows that life was never against him. Only the man bitten by misfortune believes that. But when the sun rises again and smiles upon him, he quickly realises how wrong he was.

If I were not me, I’ll say this to me… ten years ago; what aspect of your life should you leave alone to develop on its own? And if I were me, I’ll say; A lot of them.

Most of the things we worry about never happen. Because worries are often symptoms of shortsightedness.

I am sorry I could not pick one thing I’ll let develop on its own because they were many. But I’ll summarise them in this one sentence;

Something to do, someone to love and something to look forward to.

I stopped worrying about them and let them develop on their own, and today I got them all! Medium and KTHT is one of them…

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If I Were Not Me, I’ll Say This to Me

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