I Wished I Could Be Anyone But Myself

I was me, and that was all I had

From a young age, I wished I could be anyone but myself.

As the years passed, the weight of my longing grew heavier,

Like a burden I carried with me wherever I went.

I painted on a smile, pretending everything was fine,

But inside, I was drowning in a sea of self-doubt and uncertainty.

I searched for validation in the eyes of others,

Desperate for someone to see me, to truly see me,

And yet, no matter how much I tried to please,

I always felt like I fell short, like I wasn’t enough.

I watched as my peers forged their paths with confidence,

While I stumbled in the shadows, afraid to step into the light.

I yearned for the courage to stand tall and proud,

But fear held me back, whispering lies of unworthiness in my ear.

I wondered if anyone else felt the same way I did,

If anyone else struggled to find their place in the world.

But it seemed like everyone else had it all figured out,

Leaving me feeling even more alone in my struggle.

And so, I continued to search, to chase after a version of myself

That existed only in my dreams and fantasies.

But no matter how far I roamed, how hard I tried,

I couldn’t escape the truth: I was me, and that was all I had.

It took time, and it took courage,

But slowly, I began to peel back the layers of pretense,

To embrace the person I had been all along,

Flaws and all, imperfect yet uniquely me.

And as I learned to love myself, to truly love myself,

The longing to be someone else began to fade,

Replaced by a sense of peace and acceptance,

As I finally found my place in my own life.

From a young age, I wished I could be anyone but myself.

But now, as I stand on the precipice of my own truth,

I realise that there is no one I would rather be than the person I have become.