I Was a Drinker from a Drinking Town

Now I have found fun without a drink

Trust me, you can dance. —Bud Light

Good Times

Bud Light was my drink of choice for many years. I bought cases and cases of it to share with friends. Good times were had by all, from what we can remember. We even thought we could dance.

Unfortunately, we also thought we were invincible. High levels of consumption led to a lot of risky behavior. I couldn’t imagine life without alcohol. What fun could that be? I thought drinking was the only path to good times.

I have since seen the light, without Bud Light. (This is not an affiliate link. This is not a judgment of anyone that still lights the path to good times with their drink of choice. I hope everyone is happy and safe.)

Drinking Town

I grew up in what could be considered a drinking town if that were a recognized category. What I mean by that is most people drank daily. I was drinking a couple of times a week by the age of fifteen. This wasn’t just a glass of wine with dinner. I was getting drunk.

Every social event I can remember throughout my childhood included alcohol. Again, this was heavier consumption than just sipping fine wine. It was most often many beers that sometimes lead to shots of harder alcohol. I am glad I never got much into harder alcohol. But, drinking was a regular part of my life growing up and into adulthood. (Confession: I did like strong jello shots with my beer on occasion.)

The glass recycling bin in the picture above was taken in my hometown. If you look closely, most of the glass bottled alcohol before hitting the bin. There are some juice bottles. There is a good chance some of the juice was used to mix drinks. The town is still a drinking town, but I am no longer a drinker.

Just to make sure I wasn’t wrong about this label I grabbed a few per capita facts about wholesale liquor sales in the county back in 2016.

The County: $249 Statewide Average: $132 Lowest County in the State: $52

Yep. I am from a drinking town. These numbers only represent hard liquor sales. Most people I know drink a lot more beer than liquor so this is just a glimpse into the situation. The numbers are old. So is the habit. Probably not much has changed since then from my observation.

There are two kinds of people I don’t trust: people who don’t drink and people who collect stickers. ― Chelsea Handler

Drinkers

I don’t know any sticker collectors. I can’t speak to that. But, after I moved away from the drinking town I grew up in, I do recall my response when I met people that didn’t drink:

“He/She doesn’t even DRINK!”

It was shocking to me. What did they do? Did they have any fun?

Even more shocking to me, my husband was one of those people. I ended up marrying someone that never drank.

I remember one night shortly after we met. We were preparing to go out for the night. When we got ready to leave, he couldn’t believe that in such a short time I had already finished the beer I was drinking. Well, little did he know, I had three others while he was waiting for me to take a shower and get ready.

On another occasion, his mom stopped by our apartment. There were a few beers in the fridge. In my life, a few beers in the fridge is not enough to have company. For her, a few beers was shocking. She is not a drinker. She couldn’t believe her son’s fridge had beers in it. She still remembers that. I know because she mentions it sometimes.

I still drank quite often after we met and even for years after we got married. I was a drinker from a drinking town.

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy. ― Frank Sinatra

The Best and Worst of Times

I didn’t think life could be fun without alcohol. My best times had been fueled by it. Even now, I cherish the memories. We had fun.

On the other hand, some of my worst times were fueled by alcohol too. I had close friends and family that experienced deadly and potentially deadly accidents, health problems, and run-ins with the law.

When I was about twelve, my parents chose to walk home one evening from the bar instead of riding back in the boat with their friends. That decision saved them from a boat crash that killed two family friends and severely injured others. I got my first Minor in Possession (of alcohol) citation when I was fourteen. For some reason, none of these incidents served as reasons to curb my own drinking. I was a drinker from a drinking town.

I don’t have a drinking problem ‘Cept when I can’t get a drink. ― Tom Waits

Giving Up Drinking

I never felt as if I had a drinking problem. Maybe I didn’t in comparison to others. Maybe I did in reality. It wasn’t a drinking problem that caused me to give up drinking. Here are the two things that did.

I had a teenaged student whose father died from drug and alcohol-related reasons. His mother was in and out of jail for drug and alcohol-related problems. He ended up homeless and I adopted him. I didn’t drink for a bit when he first came.

One day he was at the basketball court with my husband and I thought I could relax, have a drink, and enjoy a moment to myself. The whole adoption came along unexpectedly and happened rather quickly. I thought I could really use a drink.

As soon as I popped the bottle, and the vapor rose from the neck of the bottle, I got a call from my husband. He suffered hard contact between his eye and another player's elbow. He needed stitches. Our son wasn’t old enough to drive yet. I had to pick them up and take my husband to the emergency room.

At that moment I realized the magnitude of the responsibility I signed up for. I was on call 24/7 from that moment on. It wasn’t my son that was hurt in this situation but if it ever were, I couldn’t bow out because I was drinking.

I also felt like my son’s best chance at life would include a model that did things differently than his birth family had. I very rarely drank again.

On occasion, while on vacation, if my son was responsibly cared for or he was away at college, I would have an occasional drink.

Even my occasional drinking stopped when I found out I had some minor health issues. I could no longer afford to consume the empty calories or damage my hereditarily weakened liver. I have consumed fewer drinks in the last two years than I sometimes had in a night when I was a drinker.

I Was Wrong

I really didn’t think it was possible to have fun without alcohol. It may sound odd to some people but when you grow up packing a cooler for every outing, it happens. It is sometimes hard to think outside of what you are used to.

To my surprise, in the past two years, I have managed to have fun without alcohol. Same people, same fun, no drinks for me.

The end of my drinking happened rather quickly. The having fun part took a bit longer. I was used to drinking in social situations. It took me a while to adjust to socializing and having fun without having my mind in an altered state.

As it turns out, I can have fun after all. I am glad I was wrong.

Final Thoughts

I am still from a drinking town. I am no longer a drinker. I am a designated driver when I am home. That has earned me a lot of gratitude.

I still haven’t tried dancing without drinking. Maybe I should. I still don’t think that is a good idea, but I have been wrong before.

I will always be from a drinking town. Will I ever be a drinker again? Maybe, in moderation.

Nature, photography, awe practices, travel, and writing (without drinking) are taking over my life and I am as happy as can be. The absolute best part — I haven’t had a hangover in more than two years! Cheers!

Thanks for reading! I hope everyone finds a happy and healthy balance in their lives. There is fun to be had by all!

Thanks to Counter Arts for providing this space to share. Thanks to Christopher Robin for this prompt. It prompted some valuable reflection.